happysiomai.blogspot.com

Shift to old school

2012-01-28T23:49:00.001+08:00

I want to go back to my roots. To those days when deadline was my utmost inspiration, when writing meant substance and depth. Expect the posts to be less often than usual. Part of my low post output problem is my dear old Compaq laptop who gave up on me so I have to fish for internet surfing after my sister's done with ALL her work. And did I say I'm borrowing her laptop too? Yes my dear reader, isa akong muchacha ng Internet ngayon. :)) When an idea hits me though, I get my Starbucks planner (which I rarely use for planning) and write random whatever(s), blog style. If and when I'll upload them still remains a question. I'm kinda loving the old school style of writing. Feather pen and ink na lang ang kulang! But seriously, masarap din magsulat ng old school paminsan-minsan. I don't want to lose my engineering lettering that scored ace on my many laboratory reports!

Anyway, back in the day I created this blog, I thought maybe I can make this as an avenue to practice Filipino. It turned out that I can't really turn my back against my roots (English has always been my medium since high school). Fast forward a few years later, after student life, this has been a drain of all sorts of every thing I can think of (That's a good representation of how my state of mind was at the time). And now more than ever, I want to sort that chaos. Let me bring back (and I quote my friend) the grammar Nazi.

***
Limited time to think, write and post. Those may be the best inspirations to come up with my personal best article, which to date is still in limbo (To be honest, I haven't done anything to my satisfaction yet.). I had the same problems back when I started writing seriously, who knows what good it'll do now.

For now, I'll think of a theme to write about while holding a book from my sister's bookcase, feet up, and daydreaming. Zzzzzz...

Dear ...

2012-01-06T23:26:00.002+08:00

Alam ko palagi kitang pinapagod. Palaging inaabuso. Minsan alam kong pakiramdam mo wala akong pakialam. Oo, aminado ako. Lagi kitang naabuso, pinaghinhintay, iniiwan. Pero naman, may pakialam ako sa 'yo. Kung wala, tatagal ba tayo ng almost four years? Hindi naman di ba? Ingat na ingat pa nga ako sa yo, kasi ayaw kitang masaktan. Lagi kitang naaalala pag-uwi ko. Kahit gabing-gabi o umaga pa ko nakauwi, di ba nag-bobonding pa din tayo? Pero bakit ganun? Sinusukuan mo naman ako nang walang basehan.

Sobrang unfair mo. Matapos ang lahat ng pagmamahal na binigay ko, lahat ng oras na ginugol ko, bigla-bigla ka na lang nawawala. Iniiwan mo ako sa ere. Tas pagkatapos ng isang araw, saka ka pa lang ulit matinong makakausap. Naging malupit ba ko sa 'yo para ma-deserve ko ang lahat ng ginagawa mo ngayon?

Hindi man kita matawagan o matext, di ibig sabihin wala akong pakialam. Palagi naman tayong nag-e-email at Facebook ah. Constant naman ang communication natin, kaya hindi ko talaga maintidihan kung bakit nagagalit ka at random times and at any given time. Minsan sumasabay ka pa sa oras na pressured at busy ako, saka ka magtatampo. Naiintindihan ko yun. Kaya nga hinihintay kitang lumamig para makapag-usap tayo. Ganyan ka ka-special sa ken. Pero recently, lagi ka nang nagtatampo. At nauubusan na ko ng pasensya.

Ewan, hindi ko na alam. Kung ikaw ang unang susuko, hindi ako maghahabol. Itaga mo sa bato yan. There are many fishes in the ocean, you know. Akala mo ba wala akong ipapalit sa 'yo? Sige lang, mag-init ka lang. Hindi masisira ang ulo ko dahil sa mga kalokohan mo, Compaq C700 Notebook PC!

First :D

2012-01-01T17:22:00.003+08:00

There's not much to be said, except of course, this post marks the first for 2012. Here's to new beginnings, more love and happy endings. Happy new year! Cheers!

Confessions

2011-12-29T22:25:00.000+08:00

It's hard to write this part of me. Somehow, I feel I should because it feels right.

***

Just like any girl, I have weight issues. I'm ever conscious of my body weight. I control what I eat. I skip meals. There was a point when my weight dropped drastically and people were starting to comment on how I was shrinking by the day. My friends whom I didn't see for a year said I was paper-thin; my office mates were saying I was just getting thinner. At that time, I know I was abnormally underweight for my height and my clothes were getting too baggy for me. Stress, fatigue and meal skipping didn't help me very much. But what was more alarming was that I took all the skinny comments as compliments, as a sort of motivation to get skinnier (I admit, it was very psychedelic of me). When I hit 41kg in the scale (and having thoughts of maintaining that, or even less, for life), that's when I stepped on the brakes, slapped myself awake, packed my bags and left for a different environment. I knew I had to take charge, before I become too obsessed in becoming like a toothpick. I don't know what triggered what and when. I literally don't know.

Thankfully for me, I turned out well. I didn't need any psychiatrist or my resident online therapist. But there are other girls out there who constantly battle the pressure to look good (aka mapayat dapat), and in some cases, they resort to extremes (anorexia, bulimia, eating patterns). It is a constant battle for me too. I try to get away from the scale as much as I can ( I don't check as regular as the earlier part of the year.) and thankfully too, the I-don't-care-who-you-are-where-you're-from air of the city is doing me some good. I eat when I can (healthy food at that). I walk to the office. I take the stairs. I join fun runs. There's nothing more engrossing than trying to live a healthy life.

So guys, on your next get together parties, please don't pick on your sister's/girlfriend's/girl friend's/all female friends' weight just for the heck of it. It may sound like a joke, or you're thinking you're just being honest, but sometimes, when you touch on THAT subject, everything else blanks out but the word, FAT. And if you hit it with someone like me, chances are you're changing her life to ways you and I can never imagine. The human mind is capable of so much things other than the ones stated above, you know. Be careful of what you say and how you say it. It should take no other course but that.

And girls, I know it's hard to hear harsh comments about your looks but it's harder not to take charge. Believe me, you're more than what the world perceives you to be. Refuse to fit the mold; make your own. Defy the conventional; be the standard. Sometimes, it's not a matter of how they look at you; oftentimes, it's how you look on yourself. Love yourself a little bit more. That makes all the difference. :)

Of Christmas, Sorkin and prepaid load

2011-12-23T18:32:00.000+08:00

Bakasyon na ang utak ko. As in wala nang gustong gawing 'necessities'. I'm happy at least I'm on the normal day shift, no conflict whatsoever with duty. That means my Christmas is free to be celebrated with family. :)

But wait, there's a kick in the end. I don't know yet if I'm leaving for work ON Christmas or very, very,very early the next day. Morning shift calls, you see. That's one of the drawbacks of being in this industry. But even so, I'm thankful. Having gone through everything this past two years made me appreciate all that I have, every minute I spend with the people I love. It made me understand life better and complain less, strive harder and believe more. And perhaps, Aaron Sorkin's power quote really did help me get through this year--Do what is hard; achieve what is great; know that your capacity to meet the challenge may well be limitless. :D

I'll have no internet access for the next two days so let me greet you in advance, just like how they do it in the HP series:

Happy Christmas! :D

---
Shoot, kelangan nga palang mag-load ng prepaid. :P

Finally, write time

2011-12-21T21:58:00.000+08:00

December schedule is crazy as expected but I didn't foresee that this month would be as busy as this.

Checklist:
Corporate Xmas Party---check
Team Year-End Party--check
Office churvaloo--check
Christmas giveaways---semi-check (T^T) -->Nawawalan na ko ng hope na matatapos ko itey.

Minsan, naiisip ko, kulang ang 24 hours sa isang araw. Hindi ko magawa lahat kasi naman lagi akong naiipit sa traffic ng EDSA, Monumento at Blumentritt, all in one day. Kahit mas malapit ang opis ko ngayon compared sa opis ko dati, ang equivalent travel time ko naman ngayong sa QC ang office ay pareho lang ng one way na Manila to Batino, Laguna. Isabay mo pa na laging umuulan every hapon. Maygad. Nakakapagod, nakakainis ang traffic.

***

Light mood naman. Kakatapos lang ng year-end party ng group last Monday. Pero di pa man nagsisimula ang Monday, feeling ko doomsday na. Last Sunday kasi inabot kami ng 10pm sa Sunday class. 1130pm na ko nakauwi ng bahay, tapos nagbalot na lang ako nang barubal nung mga prizes sa party games. Inabot ako ng 2am. Di na ko natulog at dumerecho ako sa 5am duty. Tas tuloy yun hanggang matapos ang year-end party. Sakit sa ulo pre. Nung Bandila na, wala, bagsak na ko, no energy at all left. All worth it naman. At least na-appreciate ng mga officemates ang party na co-organized with two others. :D

***

I hope to end the year right. I know I can't equal the number of posts I made last year, but this year I made a lot of other breakthroughs too:

1. Hindi sinasadyang nag-donate ng phone--Nanakawan akesh
2. Hindi sinasadyang nag-donate ng wallet--Nanakawan ulit akesh
3. Mas madalas magka-bruises that I lost count already--As in weekly na. Kala ko may leukemia na ko :))
4. Nanood ng football game sa Rizal Memorial.
5. Breathed the same polluted air as David Beckham. :))
6. Engaged in running--Squeezed even in my tight schedule
7. Pinanood ang HP7 nang solo flight.
8. Kumanta ulit ng Somewhere I belong sa videoke--And earned 90 points sa pagkanta ng chorus lang
9. Purchased a pair of boots--courtesy of Ate. Ahahaha, sa wakas! Now I'll pair it with my brown mini... :D
10. Splurged in shopping and was overbudget by 150pesos lang naman. Pasok pa din! LOL

Next year, I hope I can do better, especially with the housekeeping. Sana lang talaga, mas madami akong oras. Anyway, I hope I can do better; I will do better; I MUST do better. That's just how it goes for me. Ciao!

Catalog, catalogue

2011-12-10T18:16:00.001+08:00

I was in the Megamall last night, whiling the night away with some of my closest college friends, when Friend 1 suggested we hit Payless shoe source. And while I was entertaining myself with the sight of countless cute shoes, I saw a pair of brown knee-high soft leather boots (it also comes in black). Oh believe me, half of me wanted to buy it right there and there, but I was semi-scared because the item's got no tag I might spend above my means! So before I invest, I'd like to splurge a little. If Facebook comments about the price hold true, then I'm coming back for that pair. If not, then I say, "See you another year." :))

***
My sister is starting to talk me into organizing all my shoes in a catalogue (I honestly don't know how she arrived at that idea. In denial pa kooo). Since space is always an issue, my shoes are all stacked in boxes with no labels, no anything. Whenever I need a pair, I'll open each box until I find the one I need. I know it's not the most scientific way to find a pair, and since I'm the engineer, I'm starting to seriously put sister's plan to action. I wonder if my librarian friend can help me out... :D

***
PASKO NA. MALAPIT NA. Pero wala pa din sa completion rate ang Christmas list. Waaaah T_T

What Leo taught me

2011-12-03T14:20:00.001+08:00

Define December:

-The twelfth month of the calendar year, when cool and dry weather is expected in Manila (freezing degress centigrade in Baguio) and rather occasional rain showers as of late.

-When shops sprout one after the other and ELJ hallways become too crowded for walking;

-When some are reaping the fruits of days and days of drinking Starbucks coffee, claiming DUH illustrous planner that defines the Starbucks Christmas season;

-When I start running out of gift ideas. LOL

***

Last night while heading home, I took a slightly different route from the usual. I usually walk the street at Blumentritt going to Rizal Avenue but given the horrific road conditions (rain and road repairs aren't exactly the best combination), I took Cavite Street (still going to Rizal Ave) which is slightly longer, but minus all the filth and mud (Even on good days, Blumentritt is a mess. Welcome to the third world!). And did I say that I did all that at past 10PM? (On bad office days, it's sometimes beyond that time)

Sometimes, I do tend to forget about my own security. I don't bring anything for self-defense (Does the pint sized-balisong keychain count?), don't know any criminal busting moves (But I do know how to run. That'll save my life!). The more I think about it, the more vulnerable I feel should my city show its ugly head. And for someone like me who walks alone in alleys in the dark of the night, that is unimaginable.

Pero wala, lakasan na lang ng loob. Like I stand a choice over going home or getting stuck there, scared out of my wits. It's like what Leo McGarry once said:

"Act as if ye have faith and faith shall be given to you. Put it another way: Fake it till you make it!"

***

Seriously though, I'm looking forward to my December schedule. It starts a little early at 5am, but I don't mind (Anyway I feel I'll eat my words at the middle of the month, ahahahaha). I've got a lot of things that I didn't get to do because of midsh-t so...There. :D Anyone who dares mess my schedule shall meet death!

There are some things I've got to do now, but I'm screwing them all up to have this one full day of internet access. This doesn't happen very often you know! BWAHAHAHAHA. Christmas list is still brewing, I don't know if I can finish on time...*fidgetting, fidgetting...Wish me luck.

Light and darkness

2011-11-28T06:44:00.001+08:00

I haven't written anything in a while, thanks to my crazy schedule. You know, bit by bit, I'm starting to understand why young people in first world countries get their guns and shoot innocent strangers in schools, restaurants or malls. When life in the city gets too suffocating and you can't keep up, for others, the answer is the trigger.

Single life is, (How do I put this...) do-all-you-can-with-every-minute-you've-got-'cause-there's-no-other- time-to-do-it-but-now-and-when-you-missed-it'll-add-to-the-unending-to-do-list-that-never-gets-done-anyway. Yeah, pretty much that's that. :)) Anyway, I feel the future will still be the same, so I'll adore, love, and worship every single bit of this independence (Semi, actually. My sister's with me).

That's why I need a breather...from everything. And one rest day ain't good enough. I don't want to go back to the way things were a year before (That ornate and nightmare-ish schedule) and seriously, I don't want to be one big ball of negativity all over again.

***
Speaking of breathers, I finally managed to join a fun run again (after some months of hiatus, because of well, you know what) last Saturday at the Mall of Asia grounds. Ang hirap talaga pag MOA ang venue, ang daming liko (Roxas Boulevard remains as my top choice of roads to run)! But nevertheless, I enjoyed the run and it looks like my average running time for 5K will always be within 47-48 minutes. Bummer. I promise to improve because it gets too embarrassing that my running partner gets too way ahead (She's five minutes ahead) and I'm left behind. The longest I can run without stopping is a mere 1k (Amp talaga, wahahaha). My legs are still hurting from the after effects of a long hiatus, and it doesn't help that my left arm is hurting too (side effect of a vaccine). Kahapon, I dragged myself to Ortigas (in spite of every throbbing pain) because I had no choice but to go! LOL.

***

Light is radiant because of darkness. Darkness is sublime because there is light.

In spite of everything, I know there's still something to smile about. That's one thing I never want to lose. I say this like Lord John Marbury: I'm off!!!

The gust of wind

2011-11-14T08:37:00.001+08:00

I wish there'll be one day in my life, just one day, when I can think free of work or training or what to cook for dinner or the mountain of clothes that await my pressing.

Insert gust of wind and bunch of hay under the desert sky here.

...

ASA NAMAN.

Tama. :P

...
Believe it or not, I managed to watch Pacquaio vs Marquez Sunday afternoon just after lunch, no commercials and as good as PPV. Ah, the perks of having genuises in the class. Google and the LCD projector never were as useful yesterday. :D The fight kinda reminded me of Hajime no Ippo. Lots of parallels in real life--both are considered each others rivals, of almost the same height, weight and reach. Pacman being the Champion, is of course Ippo, and JMM being the counter puncher, is Miyata. What brought this trip down to memory lane was a shout that echoed through the halls of the classroom while everyone else was busy watching Pacquiao demolish JMM,

"Dempsey Roll!"

Rampage. Ippo on the momentum, rocking over Sendo. Gif belongs to its rightful owner (not me though).
...
The win is all but controversial and everyone has his opinion. While this is a free country and we can say whatever we want and whenever, please. Let the professionals of the field of boxing do their jobs and to all of those who are not (including me), please be modest enough to shut those opinions denouncing each fighter. Honor the rules of boxing. Respect the judges' decision. You may not like what their score cards said, but they were the judges and you weren't. Manny won. That's about it.

Regret

2011-11-06T23:48:00.000+08:00

I know I did wrong. And I feel bad for that.

In my defense, let me just say, that the day really did not go as planned. What the circumstances have become is not of my doing. Nature took its course, damn it. Even if I wasn't directly part of that, still, I feel mad at myself for obviously making excuses and choosing the wrong choices.

Balance is always the key. I always remind myself of that. But somehow, in some ways, I outweigh one over the other and the results are just disastrous. I don't learn, in spite of my mistakes in the past.

The thing is, what should I put on the top of my priority list? I constantly ask myself that. Sometimes, I know the answer. Sometimes, I don't. In spite of what others are saying, I hope you understand that I didn't do anything in purpose. I didn't foresee what will happen today. I didn't know. I'd love to be where you're at, believe me, but just the same, I didn't see it coming.

Wrong choice, yes. And I have myself to blame.

The capacity to meet the challenge

2011-11-05T19:59:00.000+08:00

Nung estudyante pa lang ako, sinumpa ko na hindi ako mag-aaral ng Networking. Simple lang, ayoko talaga sa branch na yun ng kurso ko (Iba ang pinili kong specialization). Kasama nya sa bottom ng listahan ko ang Stat, Integration (yung to the next level, dugo ang ilong type), Telephony, at marami pang iba. Pero ngayon, kinain ko rin ang salita ko at nag-aaral ako ng Cisco. Yes, my friend. That course where you'll forever configure routers and switches so I can ping wherever and whenever to confirm if my network works.

I had the chance to have studied it in school pero ayun nga, mas pinili ko ang Communications track. Although when I look back, I feel a slight/micro mini regret because if I had taken the modules in my junior year, I could have been a certified CCNA before I graduate. But again when I look at the present and I watch Aircrash Investigations in NatGeo, I feel very much connected. Navigation was one of the modules in the Comm track and modesty aside, I was the best (EHEM) student of my class. I truly enjoyed studying Navi and at one point I considered going to PAL pero buti na lang hindi because the company's labor issues extends everything inhumane. Hindi ko inasam maging piloto kasi naman sa height ko, kahit ilagay ako sa co-captain seat, di ko abot ang controls. WAHAHAHA. And Aeronautic Engineering is also one of the hardest disciplines ever, so bye-bye.

From time to time, I recall the principles of my specialization triggered by everyday happenings. Isn't it odd that the MRT and the LRT sound different when it stops at every station? And I ask not only with the consideration of different train design, circuitry, engine, tracks, speed and load but also with regards to the each station's acoustics. Then I wonder if MRT's Mach number will be higher than LRT's, because the former moves faster from one station to the next. Ok, I'll stop with the nerd talk now.

Did I say it was fun studying engineering? Twas hard, yes, but I enjoyed it (Hindi, masochist lang talaga ako.) :D (Although sometimes I feel it's kinda compelling to study Cisco. Compelling talaga, WTH. Harharhar. But it's fun too! Bumabawi. LOL.) It's always fun learning and experiencing something new.

So I say this to myself, a hundred times or more, to pound this thought in my head:

Refuse to listen to your own excuses. Demand integrity, commitment and persistence from yourself in all your undertakings. Do what is hard. Achieve what is great. Know that your capacity to meet the challenge may well be limitless.

Sweet night everyone. :)

Holy, holy, holy

2011-10-31T09:44:00.001+08:00

I'm writing this post from the office Yes, shame on me. Sacrilege, sacrilege, sacrilege! LOL. I couldn't write last night as I was busy preparing dinner and doing some house chores after Church and training. I finished at half past ten, in time for the traditional Sunday's best horror stories anchored by Kabayan. Now, I chose not watch the the thing because I was at home alone in a night close to Hallow's eve. I mean, if you were in my place, would you dare?

Horror stories are not to my liking. Matatakutin ako e. Di kaya ng powers ko yung mga pananakot sa TV, minsan kasi they haunt me in my dreams. That's yikes to the highest level and I don't like that. So bye-bye! :P

****

It is a holiday today and tomorrow, but I've got work. I don't know yet how I'll squeeze my lunch with college friends (Byahe pa lang, ubos na ang lunch break ko.) But let's see (Sana sa Trinoma na lang kasi...LOL) if I can make it. I'd really love to go and hang-out with the guys, but my work's like this theirs is a different story. My biggest mistake was that I could've asked for an earlier shift than usual so I can compensate for the whole eight hours and still make it to Megamall. The thing is, that crossed my mind only a few moments after logging in this morning. Oo, ako na ang busy! Hmp.

I'll handle this shift until the first week of November, then I'm off to mid-sh*t...uhm, mid-shift pala. Sa wakas, di na ko gigising nang maaga! :D

Whoa

2011-10-26T10:58:00.001+08:00

I can't remember what I've written last night. Whatever it was, I know it's something that so trash-y I'd throw it away in a heartbeat. Last night, I was too exhausted but pushed on to writing. Now I don't know if I regret that decision or not (LOL. Can't check the entries now. Shame on me, I'm on the office as of writing.).

***

Schedule is full for this week. We're supposed to go on location for some tests (I was super excited for this) but unfortunately, other things came up that are on the top of the priority list. That ends my supposed meeting with the cast and crew of My Binondo Girl :(. There's still hope though. We're rescheduling after the holidays are over. Hopefully, I'll still handle the project by then. Until then, I'm just glad that the very long weekend is approaching so I can relax kahit paano. Honestly, I'm just semi-excited. I'll still be going to the office because my schedule knows no holidays, special holidays or very special holidays. But looking back, wala naman gagawin sa bahay (Except of course do some serious housekeeping. Man, this schedule is scraping out all the neatness in our humble abode).

***

Fuuuuu...Christmas is fast approaching. I have my list (still subject to changes) but I don't have the money Hahaha...What's even more challenging is how I'll work around my budget knowing how impulsive a buyer I am. Two down (I bought gifts for them yesterday. I was on budget. YEY!), 28 (or more) to go. For now, I'll sing this tune that been playing on my head since this morning: Doe, a deer, a female deer/ Ray, a drop of golden sun/Me, a name I call myself...

Have a great week ahead! :D

Kitten

2011-10-25T23:13:00.000+08:00

Long, long week ahead. My mind's been clogged with too many tasks, I literally thought it was a Thursday today only to realize I was wrong when my sister answered what day it is! Kamon...You gotta be kitten me! I mean, hindi pa ba Thursday ngayon para Friday na? Huhuhu...Well it's not like wala kaming pasok pag holidays (Kapag bagyo nga meron, holiday pa kaya?). Meron pa din kasi kelangan may umere pa din kahit holiday, Pasko, Bagong Taon. at Lent.

Anyway, I'm too exhausted to think of anything. Right now, I'm fighting to stay awake but nevermind. Finally, I'll get to sleep before midnight. :D Ay teka, may antivirus update pa kooo. Asssh :(

Fun, Crash, Kiss

2011-10-15T00:37:00.002+08:00

Mahilig ako sa comics. Nung bata pa ko at nagbabakasyon dito sa Manila (based pa kami sa province dati), every Friday, hindi namin nakakalimutan na bumili ng Funny Komiks (Favorite ko si Tinay Pinay, yeah!). Filipino art ang Funny Komiks, pure Pinoy din ang mga stories.

Nung high school naman, Culture Crash Comics or CCCom kung tawagin ang kinahumalingan ko (Lahat kaya ng issues meron kame. Pati ang 5.5 :P). Nag-level up na ang art (At paper. Glossy, kamooon) kasi nauso ang anime kaya naman Japanese strokes ang gamit ng mga artist. Lahat ng stories ng CCCom paborito ko (Kahit di ko minsan gets ang Solstice Butterfly. Malay ko ba, high school lang ako nun. LOL). Sayang nga lang at tumigil na sa pag-publish ang Funny Komiks at CCCom. Nalungkot talaga ako sa case ng CCCom kasi till the very end, umasa pa kong maglalabas sila ng bagong issue. I never got to finish Pasig though. Uhm, calling Taga-Ilog!

Pasig's Mina as CCCom cover

Sobrang nahumaling ako sa CCCom dati kasi: Una, wala silang sponsor. Independent sila. Ang EIC nila ay may-ari ng isang publishing house at isa rin sa mga writer. Ang natitirang tatlong artist ang writer at taga-drawing ng apat na stories (dobleng work yung pinakamagaling sa kanila). Pangalawa, kahit Japanese art, Pinoy na Pinoy ang mga istorya. Pangatlo, ginawang mainstream ng CCCom ang mga comic conventions para sa mga Pinoy artists. Sila (at ang Questor Magazine) ang nagpauso ng malawakang cosplay sa mga malls. Sa CCCom din ang unang cover ni Alodia Gosengfiao (and her sister Ashley), complete with full feature (Halata kasi na gustong-gusto sila ng staff. LOL). Tama na. Fan na fan ba?

Then nung college, natuklasan ko ang manga. Japanese manga, my dear, dahil na din sa recommendation of my equally anime crazy friends at sa unlimited internet sa office. Pero dahil din sa akin kaya na-ban ng DoIT ang onemanga.com sa network ng school (and eventually Facebook) HAHAHA. Uy meron dyan, mas epic pa ang nagawa compared sa akin ha. Dahil naman sa kanya, banned ang Youtube sa school. Kamon, don't be shy! Hehehe. Wag ka mag-alala pre, di ko pagkakalat ang pangalan mo. Padalhan mo na lang ako ng aguinaldo sa Pasko. Agree? Agree! Hehehehe. Correction lang ha. Dati kasi, nung panahon na gaining ground pa lang ang Youtube, pwede pang ma-surf kasi konti pa lang ang nakakaalam na pwede kang mag-share ng videos via net (less users, meaning less bandwidth usage from Youtube over the school's network). Same thing with Facebook, kasi naman back then, hindi pa alam ang social networking sa Pilipinas.

Ngayon, pag walang magawa, nagche-check ako ng updates sa Kisses comics. Nakakatuwa e. Ang mga pangalan ng mga characters, may connection (in one way or the other) sa pagkain. Astig ang artist nito, ECE din so bentang-benta sa akin ang mga jokes nya. Dati na kong fan ng Kisses, hindi lang masyadong ma-comment. Pero lagi akong nagbabasa nyan kasi nasa "Blogs to follow" yan.

Kisses Comics Cast

Si Yema. Naging wallpaper ko din itong image na ito.

Ang story naman ng Kisses ay tungkol sa main character na ang pangalan ay, tama ang hula mo, Kisses. Sa kanya at sa mga patok nyang college barkada umiikot ang story. Sa ngayon, ulitan ang series, as in back to the very beginning pero okay lang. Improved version naman e. Such a shame na di na makikita ng iba ang beta version ng Kisses. :(

At lastly, pag di ko nakakalimutan, nagbabasa din ako ng Black Butler. Full pledged Japanese art, set sa Europe ang story. Eto, pang-Criminal Minds ang genre. Ang gusto ko naman dito is maganda ang pagkasulat ng story (assumming yun talaga ang lines from Nihonggo).

Uy teka, maganda rin pala yung Kiko Machine. Made by pure Pinoy, Manix Abrera. Google him and his works. I guarantee one of his strips will make your day. :)

Ok tama na. Nagiging comics geek na ko. Hahaha.

Hola mi amigos

2011-10-08T22:57:00.000+08:00

It's been a week since my sister monopolized the internet for research purposes. Although I'm in the regular shift now, I get home around 7pm, thanks to heavy traffic in Araneta Avenue. By that time, my sister has her nose on her laptop, typing dizzily and ignoring my greetings of arrival. I don't mind that at all. That is so much more compared to when I was in graveyard shift, I don't get to see her for long on weekdays (maximum was two hours).

***
Time is of the essence and I remind myself of that everyday. So much that I get to the office more than an hour before my shift starts! It's getting to be a habit actually (since my first job) which I don't want to put to a halt anytime in the future. Sometimes, it gets a little over the edge, especially when meetings and appointments are cancelled or are running late, I easily get upset. Sayang kasi sa oras. Anyway, I value my time above anything else. Hindi mo naman kasi alam kung kelan ka mamamatay (Di ba Steve Jobs?) kaya ako, hanggat kaya, sige larga!

Often times, I want to hold myself back from racing against time. That I have to do this now, by this time I should be like this, I should have this when I'm this old...Life's not like that at all. Every once in a while, I remind myself of my conversation with a dear friend, who gave me one useful advice after the other. And every once in a while, I look back at square one. Why did I do this? What was my purpose? It kinda makes me go back to those times when I am enthusiastic for change, and I pound that to my mind, to rekindle that place, that time, that instant I was dreaming and building how the future would be like. And I want to keep on dreaming. I want to keep on building. I want to do something great, something challenging, something that will "knock off their socks."

As for that 'something', I still don't know what that is. Maybe the power-that-be-at-high-atop-the-thing will give it at the climax of my life? (Because by then the sudden fall will come. Ehem, Steve Jobs ulit.) LOL. As for now, I'll be in a race. I'll be competing with myself so might as well do my best.

When sunlight felt surreal

2011-10-02T04:57:00.002+08:00

Google's making a lot of changes in Blogger lately. This time, the dynamic view caught my attention. Notice the changes, eh? I'm loving the different layout as of the moment, but I'm still keeping the old template in the banks. Just in case. :P

***

Am still on duty. Last day of the graveyard shift today (Sumisingit lang ang blogging pag walang magawa. LOL). All I can say is.. FINALLY, SUNLIGHT! I remember the first month I was assigned as night duty, there was only a day (literally) that I saw and felt that ray of sunshine. Yes. And it felt surreal. WAHAHA. Tama na, exaggeration na e. Pero totoo, patapos na ang August nung masilayan ko ang araw. And it was just by chance, dahil nakipagpalit ako ng morning shift for that day kaya nagkita kami ng araw. These days, nasisilaw ako sa sobrang liwanag. Yes, yes, that's one of the disadvantages of seeing the different levels of darkness from deep into the night to the wee hours of the morning. Sunglasses will be put to great use though (After a two month hiatus. Yey!)

My duty will end at 5AM today but I have to back at the office by 9AM on Monday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It'll be a long day ahead, and more chores has to be done at home. I don't know if matutulog pa ko or I'll catch the last day of sale sa SM. Rest or sale? Both are equally important to meeeee :'( Talagang may ganung emo moment, but come on! When you've been on duty for the night, don't just want to sleep? And when you're on a project called Closet Revamp, don't you wanna go and shop on a sale? I'm so torn.

***

Sunday Board Plan (after work):

-Church first, eat, sleep, SALE (Bwahaha)

-Then linis ng bahay, tapos press fresh laundry

-Tas tulog (kung makakatulog man. Mas sanay na ko 7AM natutulog. Mega challenge eto.)

-Tas work ulet

Sleep is like the unicorn - it is rumored to exist, but I doubt I will see any

Let's try this

2011-09-25T19:10:00.000+08:00

I'm trying a new way of posting. Well, relatively not new, but I'm trying this for the first time. Let's just see if it works. Because if it will, that will give me the ultimate freedom of updating this blog, kahit blocked ang blogger on some networks. Hehehehe...

***

Ang bilis ng panahon. Parang kelan lang, start of the year. Then ngayon, magpa-Pasko na naman. Ngayon pa lang, iniisip ko na ang Christmas gifts. Paghahandaan ko ito, pramis. Sa ngayon, marami lang unnecessary things na kumakain sa oras ng schedule ko (Ehem, Facebook) kaya di ko masimulan.

***

I'm enjoying cooking these days. Pasta pa lang ang niluluto ko. Nahahassle akong magluto ng mga matrabahong dish dahil paggising ko, wala nang palengke. Nalalayuan din naman ako sa SM. Kaya ayan, sige, go. Hail pasta! Madaling lutuin. Buhay na kami ng kapatid ko ng mga two to three days. Yes, that will be the meal three times a day. That's the plan. LOL. Masarap ba? E basta nakakain. Yun na yun! BWAHAHAHA.

Ok, sige tama na. Got some clothes to press. And manonood pa ko ng Gandang Gabi Vice (Last body lang ang napanood ko e. Hahaha). Ciao!

Oh man...

2011-09-23T15:05:00.000+08:00

I hate this. I'm not liking this anymore. Just bring back the way things were, and maybe, I'll be happier. Although I know for a fact that life is no wonderland, still, sometimes, it slaps me in the face just to prove a point.

I hate it because I know that eventually, this will happen. I hate it because it feels disconnecting and dissociative, gaunt and ghost-like. Life's too short to be spent like this. Life's too short to be ranting like this.

All things will come to an end, so others say. Right now, I'm not in love with ALL the cancelled appointments, the sleep deprivation, the fatigue...the list goes on.

Maybe I just need a friend. :(

It's kinda...

2011-09-20T01:33:00.001+08:00

Laging kong naiisip ang mga bagay sa paligid ko. Ewan, pero hindi ko hilig magtanong ng ANO. Para sa kin, ang tanong ay BAKIT. Bakit ganito, bakit ganyan...Minsan nasa Google ang sagot. Minsan hindi. Minsan hindi ko alam kung talagang may sagot.

Siguro tinatanong nyo rin kung bakit ganyan ang intro ko. Ang sagot ko: Bakit hindi? (Wahaha) Ang totoo, gusto ko lang talagang guluhin din kayo dahil ako, nagugulumihanan din sa mga tanong ko. So sa mga nakakaalam ng sagot, comment lang. :) Drum roll please:

1. Kung mababa at laging binabaha ang Maynila, bakit mas marami pa ang underpass kaysa overpass?
-Iilan lang ang overpass, at lahat nasa stretch ng Quezon Boulevard sa may Quiapo. May isang bagong addition sa may Blumentritt-Espana pero that merits another question. Anyway, isang horrendous experience ang baha plus trip to the underpass kapag tag-ulan, lalo na pag yun lang ang choice, katulad ng underpass sa may papalabas ng Espana going to Recto (bago umilalim sa may Isetann).

2. Bakit taliwas sa babaan-sakayan ang bagong overpass sa Blumentritt-Espana?
-Hindi ko alam kung sinong henyo ang nag-propose na itayo ang overpass (mas mukha syang footbridge) kung saan kelangan pang tumawid ulit ng mga pasahero (at makipag-patintero sa mga sasakyan) ng intersection para lang makarating sa babaan-sakayan. Ang resulta? Wala masyadong gumagamit ng overpass. Halata namang ang layunin ay makatawid nang ligtas ang mga commuter, pero dahil sablay ang pwesto, ayun, walers na gumamit.

3. Bakit Soup No. 5 ang tawag sa Soup No. 5?
-Meron kayang soup no. 4, or no. 6?

4. Bakit iisa ang architecture ng Iglesia ni Kristo churches?
-Isang contractor lang kaya ang gumawa ng lahat ng church nila?

5. Kung chicken at burger ang bida sa menu, bakit Jollibee ang brand name ng Jollibee?
-Bakit walang bee?

6. Kung umorder ako ng softdrink, nag-fill, at humingi ako ng isa pang fresh cup sa Taco Bell Trinoma, pwede ba akong mag-refill?
-I filled my cup only once naman ah. :P

7. Pwede ko bang angkinin ang lahat ng sapatos na may tatak na Melissa?
-Bakit hindi? Kitang-kita naman ang ebidensya. BWAHAHAHA!

8. Sa Latin, bakit V ang ginagamit in place of U?
-Hindi ba kaya ng mga ancient people na mag-curve ng letter sa pagsulat? Stiff ng fingers nila ah.

9. Bakit magkaiba ang arrangement ng numbers sa calculator at sa cellphone?
-Yung 1,2,3 ng cellphone nasa taas. Sa calcu, nasa baba.

10. Why are boxing rings square?
-Nuff said. :))

11. Bakit sa US, English system ang gamit nilang measurement?
-When almost the whole world is using SI? Almost kasi ang Pilipinas, English and SI ang gamit. You know, we just can't decide if we'll have it at 5 kilos or 11 lbs, 183 centimeters or 6 feet. Well, bakit nga ba dalawang system of measurement ang gamit natin?

12. This comes from a friend: If teachers teach, do fingers fing?

Yan muna sa ngayon. Have a great day ahead everyone! :D

#Believe

2011-09-11T17:40:00.000+08:00

There's not much to write about. Except that I almost always fail to keep track of the days and the dates. It's been a year (unofficially) that I've been with the company. Somehow it feels like yesterday.

September 2010. We were starting the department from scratch. There were only three of us at the bottom of the food chain, then my supervisor's one level up, and the department head's at two levels. We used Microsoft Excel to great lengths, our schedules shifted, weekends became work days. We slipped by the studio dressing rooms whenever we had the chance, had "photo shoots" with the stars, stalked Enrique Gil from the Loop and all the way out. Back then, the question of whether we'll be proby or not kept nagging on our heads for months no end. Our status is as blurred as the oldest Rudy Fernandez films; the future doesn't look promising. My teammate would often ask me if a regularization contract will be coming anytime soon, to which I'll always quip by, "Manalig ka lang." (Just believe.)

Much of the months before February this year was filled with tiis moments, tiis moments, and more tiis moments. We were there, but not quite. It's as if we can see and hear, but weren't allowed to touch. Bitin, parang ganun. And there was no evening that I prayed, begged, and implored the Lord to hear the matters of our careers, and to please take the things for the better. And maybe, He got tired of hearing the same incessant prayer (verbatim at that) that after five months, He finally gave in. WAHAHAHA...

My friend once told me that I'm caught in this instant phenomenon (Think Library versus Google) that I want to apply it on everything in life, including my career. That everything has to come now, or else I start to feel unhappy or worthless (He nailed it btw.). He said that I should take a step back and take things in perspective, to look at the big picture. I know he meant good when he said I should be patient, so "Don't expect to start crossing things off on your bucket list every few months."

Every once in a while, I thank the world for having such great friends. They knock some sense out of my workaholic brain. I'm just glad that now, things are slowly falling into places. Maybe my friend is right. :)

Closet Revamp Part 1

2011-09-05T21:26:00.001+08:00

Whoa. New interface from Blogger is so new, I feel like a caveman transported to the future! Parang Mac na. Hehehe. The feeling is similar to the Nokia C3 phone issued to me just last week, which feels like light years away from my Samsung Android phone. Oo ako na, mapang-api ako! LOL. Anyway dear blogger, the new interface is cool. I just need some time to get used to it. But overall, two thumbs up! :)

Ok, I regret to inform that I take the two thumbs up back. I encountered a problem, Blogger. Hope my feedback form helps you.

***

So the revamp project is on the works, I started today. Office shoes are something that are easier to get than clothes of my size so I figured to get a pair. Actually dapat dalawa, pero medyo nahirapan akong humanap ng hindi generic na design, so ayun, isa lang ang output. At syempre, wala akong output sa top. Mas mahirap humanap ng blouse/polo. Mapayat na ko dati, pero dahil sa graveyard...Naw yu no! Sa wedding nga ni Pinsan, when I wore the dress, Ate commented that she can see traces of my pelvic bone (dun dun dun dun...dotted yung last dun :P) Imagine what horror it will be as I assume another month of graveyard shift

Now that my Mondays will be free, it will be dedicated to shopping. Yes, as long as Mondays are free and before I get to this super busy schedule ahead after September 25. Honestly, it will feel like college all over again except that I'm older and working and with many, many bills to pay. Hahaha...I don't know how many parts it will take to complete the closet revamp, but hell, I GOTTA complete this thing before the year ends! *Fingers crossed

***

My proposed plan for the next payout schedule. For strict compliance. Eyes are top priority. FINALLY! WAHAHA...

Let no other thing come in between. AMEN. :)

I was supposed to buy two pairs of flats

2011-08-29T01:23:00.000+08:00

But I ended up buying a pencil skirt after indulging an eat-all-you-can buffet dinner of pasta, pizza and salad in Chef d' Angelo. When I got home, it hit me that I could drop a few more pounds because of my schedule and the skirt wouldn't fit. Anyway, it looks more office-y than casual, but the fit was so great I couldn't let it pass. It has been proven since time immemorial how an arduous task it is to find clothes that fit my body type. So when I find that one top/pants/shorts/skirt/dress that fits perfectly, I won't let it go. Kahit magkano pa yan. My mom often thinks I'm nuts but I don't care. Ang hirap maghanap e, hanep!

Next mission: Closet revamp. I know it will be costly but I totally deserve this. Mother is irked that I've been dressing up in shirt and jeans only. Para pa rin daw akong nasa college. True at some point but there's been some improvement. I officially ditched my Chucks (which has been my pambansang sapatos since college until well, three months back) for a more "professional" get-up (the reason I was getting the flats) na mahirap naman i-achieve nowadays dahil sa ulan.

The memories of my mother giving me compliments for my fashion sense are blurry, remote even. But she loves it when I wear heels to work. I'm like, Oh good Lord. But yeah, I remember one time when I wore a 3/4 sleeves white lace-y polo, military green mini skirt and black peep toe pumps one boring Saturday for work. She was like, "You look great." Then I don this blue mini-dress with Chucks a week later. All she said was, "Asan ang shorts mo?" To this day, I can't comprehend the two outfits' hemline difference in my mother's perspective.

Which brings me again to my another ultimate dilemma. Last year (I know I wrote it in the annals of this blog), I promised to purchase a pair of boots for the windy -ber months. September's close and I ain't got any clue where to get a pair! Lhudie suggested a place which I'm checking on Wednesday. I'm not quite familiar with 168 Mall but wish me luck! I'm keeping my fingers crossed because I'll be coming from my graveyard shift, then sleep in the morning and I EARNESTLY, EARNESTLY HOPE I'll wake up at noon!

Anyway, bagyo or no bagyo, I'll be going to Divi. It will be one long day, endless lakad, hanap, lakad, tawad...I just hope I can get there on time. :))

One team, one goal, one flag

2011-08-23T15:42:00.000+08:00

Credits go to the owner of this picture.

I grew up with the men in my family watching only but two sports--basketball and boxing. Even before Manny Pacquiao rose to fame, my grandfather was a fan of boxing while my uncle watched basketball in his room every time he can on channel 13. We sometimes squabble over the remote control because my sisters and I would hang-out and watch TV in Uncle's room. Very rarely did we not fight over the remote control. :))

These days, however, not only these two sports are given the spotlight. Other disciplines are taking their share in the news feed as well. Which is a good thing by the way. Well, at least in my point of view. Somehow, we began opening our minds (and eyes and hearts) of the "other possibilities." I can't blame the general public though. Back in the days, only sports with guaranteed support and backing (and ratings) are aired on TV so that the lesser known ones are thrown in the back. I remember reading an article justifying the non-airing of other sports in UAAP. The network's answer was at the end of the day it's still business and if it doesn't guarantee any returns then might as well not air it. That is a businessman's perspective.

Other perspectives beg to differ though. And thanks to their constant pushing of their stories, we came to acknowledge the existence of the Azkals, the Dragon Boat Team, the Homeless World Cup Team et al. Finally, we did not limit ourselves, we opened the possibilities, and here we are, trying to learn more about our athletes.

We woke up to realize that there other sports besides basketball, more leagues other than the PBA, more stadiums, fields, and domes can be filled with fans rallying support for our team. I'm not against anything or anyone. But finally we realized, there's more to sports and we're supporting our players because they too, are Filipinos. It took an AFF Suzuki Cup, a Tampa, Florida World Championships, extensive news coverage and lots of Facebook and Twitter updates to achieve that.

I'd like to think that sports is like music. It transcends age and race. It is universal. It brings people together. Beyond the sweat, tears and jeers, whether here or abroad, in the field or at home, under the scorching sun or the pouring rain, we are behind our men. And when a goal permits, we erupt in cheers. We sing our hearts to the tune that binds us as one. We cheer, we sing, we unite for one team. One flag. One goal. When the drum starts the beat and with pumped up adrenaline, we shout in one resounding voice: Pilipinas!

We're off to a good start. Let's just hope this not all but hype and the flame keeps on burning on every believer of the Philippine national teams. :)

Boo!

2011-08-21T00:06:00.000+08:00

My insomiac-like sleeping patterns are put to good use, stretched to great lengths before culminating to the ultimate graveyard shift that will last for two months. Yeah, it's not that easy not to adapt my sleep time during weekdays to my weekends but my body clock has changed. And it doesn't care what day of the week it is. :(

Most of my time is spent too much on sleeping, too much that I miss time to run a few errands (At ayoko nun. Waah. I'll get more of that when I die!). There's no room for complaints now. Might as well accept this. It won't last forever naman.

The fact of the matter is that I'll be like this till the end of September. What happens after that will be unbelievably "normal". The concept remains alien to me but if it will give me back my social life, then screw alien and embrace normal all the way! :D

Off topic: September's close! *in great jubilee* Clap, clap, clap. :D

Can ≠ Should

2011-08-15T00:29:00.004+08:00

I love weekends. Hindi lang dahil ang weekend ay week end, pero dahil these days let me unwind a little bit. No stress from work and all (although I found it hard to sleep last night. Nasanay ata ako sa night shift? Halaaa...). Anyway, it's nice to be at home and be lazy for a while (Being a couch potato is kinda my thing. Wahahaha). At times though, I'd think of anything substantial to write, a topic I'd like to challenge. But in the end, I don't want to get in trouble with the authorities (or with anyone for that matter). Who knows, the HR could be watching. LOL.

That brings me to the Youtube video a friend shared on his wall a few days ago. A news report about a driver's car set afloat by flood water in Mother Ignacia Street. What stood out was the "highlight" of the report: the driver's rampaging remark, "I should have been informed." I know you heard all about it in social networking sites, even in the news you may say.

One part of what he said was true. No warning sign of "Flooding during heavy rains" can be found in Mother Ignacia. No street sign whatsoever. This doesn't hold true for Sgt. Esguerra, the other street near Mo. Ignacia (They have "Flooding during heavy rains" sign near the corner of Panay Avenue). I don't know Brgy. South Triangle's stand on this, but considering that Ignacia has a higher probability of flooding, won't they consider? And for the record, Araneta Avenue also experiences heavy flooding during rainy days. But there's this big green sign written in bold white letters that say, "Kapag malakas ang ulan, bumabaha sa Araneta Avenue." And proceeds to giving the instructions for an alternate route. And another thing, if you're not familiar with the streets in South Triangle, it's easy to misjudge the streets. One second you're going uphill, the next second, downhill. That end of Ignacia where the driver was caught off guard is LOWEST point of the street. Kung EM wave yun, that point is the trough. Yes, ganun kababa. I'm assuming it was his first time to hit that side of the road (Otherwise he can't argue that he wasn't informed).

Yes, his argument was right. He should have been informed by street signs, by the bystanders, or by the news crew. It reminds me of Murphy's Law,

Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

The video's gone viral, thanks to the power of social networking. Netizens are quick to brand him stupid and arrogant, but really, does anyone know the guy at all? He who has not sinned should cast the first stone.

Everyday at work, I realize how powerful the media can be. But social networking is much, much more powerful because they reach a global audience within seconds without the aid of tapes, a 54 MHz signal, an antenna or a TV set. "The internet is written in ink," Sorkin wrote. That clip may forever be archived in Youtube's server for the world to preview, dislike, share and comment on. Poor guy. So next time you post, like, share, and comment, think about it. What happened to that poor guy could have happened to you or me. Think twice before you click. Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.

You already

2011-08-13T14:00:00.000+08:00

To whom it may concern:

Ikaw na. Ikaw na talaga. Kayo na ng kausap mo ang sobrang nasisiyahan sa chismis. Kahit alam mong nasa third floor ka ng bahay mo at ang kausap mo ay nasa kapatagan, gorabels lang ang kakasigaw nyo. Winner ang conversation nyo, Ate. Walang panama ang mga barker sa Espana. Kung nagtapat siguro ako ng sound level meter sa inyo, nasa 120 dB kayo. Pakshet, threshold of pain, Ate! Alam mo yun?!

Harinawat makarma kayong dalawa at maging pipi kayo for two months, para naman kahit pano makatulog ako nang matiwasay sa umaga. Hindi ko alam kung anong kaligayahan ang nakukuha nyo sa sigawan na pag-uusap pero sana, naisip nyo, ang sigawang pag-uusap ay sa bundok lang nagaganap. Hindi yan ginagawa ng mga edukadong tao.

Wag ka nang dumagdag sa noise pollution ng mundo, parang awa mo na. Ang laki mong health risk sa mundo. Alam mo bang may research na nagsasabi na may link ang sufficient noise intensity, duration and upredictability at ang cardiovascular diseases? Kaya please lang, let's all try to live peaceful lives, pwede ba 'yun?

In the meantime: SILENCIO! Please patulugin nyo 'ko. Maawa kayo sa panggabi. T_T

Graveyard

2011-08-09T17:01:00.002+08:00

Graveyard shift don't rock at all. First, I'm taking a different route to work (no more endless walking to the terminal) rather I have to take the traditional road of going to EDSA (Yes, that soul-sucking-traffic-laden path) and yes, I'm taking the bus (kahit ayoko dahil delikado and I'm under the impression na laging binobomba ang mga bus sa EDSA). But I've got no choice: it's the fastest and cheapest route to get to the office.

Second, I can't wear my shades anymore!!! :( Yeah, that kinda sucks, too. It is a struggle to commute wearing contacts only (Sakit sa mata). I used to wear contacts then sunglasses to protect my eyes against the wind pero mas ayoko naman na magmukhang tanga dahil madilim na at naka-shades pa ko. Pagkamalan pa kong bulag (Anubey, Ate? Wahaha).

Anyway, the shift's is not as astounding as I thought. At least for yesterday. It was like my Saturday duty, minus all the work. I had to make butingting of everything to keep myself awake. And when I can't keep my eyes open anymore, I took a nap at 3AM only to wake up after an intermittent dream of program files our server receives in haste. The next shift was at the office at 04:45am and that was when finally, I felt I can go home already. :D

Hello, ice-cold black coffee. We'll meet again. Later :))

And it comes in pairs

2011-08-06T02:08:00.001+08:00

This is a late post. Late in a sense that I should have posted this three days ago, but I was preoccupied with work and my sister continues to monopolize the internet at home. Hence, on the wee hours of Saturday, when I am the queen of this house's cyber world, I shall write. Bwahahaha..

If you ask how my career got to a start and a (quick) halt, I'll say it always starts in August and ends in February. I got my first job on August 3,2009; was a regular employee by February 2010; resigned on August; got my second job on September; and finally signed the "official" contract February 2011; regular (officially) by August but with some string pulling here and there (which I didn't make by the way) was made a month earlier. The set-up's kinda intertwined but the point is: Happy 2nd anniversary to employment! Here's to more exporting, database managing, file analysis, and rat racing. CHEERS!!!

Good news is filling my week, and I couldn't be any happier. Blessings sure are sweet when you know how it feels to have nothing, work for nothing extra in return, when you've waited long and hard, and prayed and believed hard enough. I guess, we're reaping the fruits of our labor? Although it's too early to say that, but still, it's absolutely amazing to have achieved the way we are today and still keep our heads sane. :)) When changes are happening every hour (and I mean literally) and it's too hard to keep up, I'm just glad to have the "support system" to back me up. My sincerest thanks goes to you, teammates.

My thanks also goes to people I rant to about work, life, and stress in general--to my friends, close friends, and closest friends. Really, what would I do without you, guys? I honestly don't understand how you always know what to say, when and how, but it relieved me. Rak en roll, men!

Hey Armand, I'm scratching off one in my bucket list! :P

Nang dahil sa wedding

2011-07-31T21:55:00.001+08:00

Two months from now, a-attend ako ng wedding ng pinsan ko. Abay daw kaming magkakapatid (or tatlong Maria as my Titas love to label us). Ang theme ay red and white. Ang damit ay red and white dapat. Ang catch: maghanap ng damit na red and white.

Unang stop: Trinoma
Hanap kami ni Ate sa bawat sulok. Two hours kaming umiikot. Pasok sa isang shop, hanap ng red dress, kung meron, mag-fit. Pag hindi maganda, off to the next. Meron kaming nakita sa The Ramp. Red lace dress. Ganda sana e, kulang sila sa size. Walang extra dress na small ang size (Kasi dapat dalawang small for me and my Melanie. Then si Ate, medium). Pwede magpa-made to order, pero extra charge. Ginto na nga ang price nung damit, may extra charge pa kung papagawa ng extra. Kahit na I love the dress, the price is a different story! We ditched the idea altogether. After lunch ng 3PM (yes hanggang weekend, wala ako sa oras kumain), lipat kami ng mall.

Second stop: Glorietta
Bago pumunta ng Glorietta (na talagang stop namin dapat), dumaan muna kami sa formal wear section ng SM. May nakita kaming one or two na pwede na pero we had to go to Glorietta (We just have to, you know? Hahaha). Naisip kasi ni Ate na mas malaki nga pala ang The Ramp dun, and meron pang Rustan's (Oo nga naman...). Nakakadisappoint nga lang kasi wala din kaming napili. Kung meron man, wala namang kulay red. And kung meron ulit, equated to one term of tuition fee ko sa Mapua ang halaga (Imagine nyo na lang!). So lumusot ulit kami sa kapitbahay nyang SM.

Third stop:SM Makati
Remember the motto: We got it all for you. They really do. Amen to that. The problem we had at the Ayala malls was that they seem to have this one-design-one-dress-policy. Ewan, gusto ata nila as elite as possible ang magsusuot ng mga damit nila. Heeellloowww. Anyway, lifesaver ang SM. Salamat po, Mr. Henry Sy. :) Alam kong magiging busy na on the coming weeks kaya bumili na din ako ng shoes.

Heels kung heels. Ayun ung box nya, di ko na na-edit. Am tinatamad. >:)

Sakit sa paa at balikat. At sa bulsa. I paid for all our dresses! Maygad. My sisters will pay me after naman. But still...Whoa! Libo-libo na nga ang nagastos ko, SM plastic pa rin ang package. Don't I get a complimentary SM bag? I spent so much after all you know. Just saying. :P

When Vitamin C can't cut it

2011-07-23T00:09:00.000+08:00

Here is one fine day. Off to a slow start. Light load against yesterday, which I'm very thankful for. My asthma is back. At least for the time being. The symptoms have been sitting for quite sometime, even the meds can't hold it back. As I'm typing this, I'm still shaking mildly. Duh. Side effect of my 4mg Salbutamol (Settling for 2mg more has its consequences).

Still, being sick is getting on my nerves. I constantly feel I'm not on my prime. Can't do the things I used to do or eat what I want to eat. That windy Sunday afternoon is to blame because it blew every thing, even pollen and allergens (and everything in between) I bet. After a some freaking colds and cough, behold, my asthma (Take a bow here). I had to cancel weekend plans for exercise (Which kinda disappointed me) and my planned trip to the salon (Ang haba na masyado ng herr ko. Literally.).

But somehow, not even my age-old sickness can stop me from going to the theaters. I'll go and see HP Part 2 once and for all! Then there's Captain America, and, and, and...Ah basta. HUH! :P

Naging crush ko rin sya for a while during high school. :))

Me gusta :)

2011-07-17T09:41:00.000+08:00

Maagang nagsimula ang araw ko kahapon. 10am kasi dapat nasa school na ko to meet some friends/former colleagues from college. It was a reunion of sorts, at in time for the school's welcome "party" for the freshmen. And it really looked like some sort of party. Alam agad kung sino ang freshmen, party mode ang mga kasuotan! Ang sarap tuloy isigaw, "Where's the party guys?" Ahahaha, tama na, bully na ko masyado. Anyway, it's just one of those feelings that you get. That your Alma Mater gets more and more elitist by the day because the rising tuition fees make it more accessible to the upper class than the lower classes.

I met Ean (na wala pang tulog dahil galing sa night shift sa HP) and Stephen (after experiencing technical problems in the LRT) in the TNB office while waiting for the rest. Most of them came lunch time na (Kuya Ray and Eunice and Venz). Yung isa, 10am ang usapan, 3pm dumating (San ka pa kay Allan? Some things never change. LOL). But never mind that. When Allan came, there was never a dull moment sa office. Laugh trip bonggang-bongga. :))

Sagot ni Kuya Ray ang lunch (Thank you very much. Happy birthday again!) sa Rockers. Bago bumalik ng office, we met Sir Benny (The Adviser) sa South Building. Chat, chat, chat (and na-issue pa si Ean and Eunice. O_O) then off we go to the ever so famous bodega ng North Building. We played this game na parang Stack-O daw sabi ni Venz. In the end, the civil engineers (Stephen and Venz) knocked down the tower thrice and IE (Allan) had his share too. Clean sheet ang MAS, ECE, CoE and Archi.

Owww, washed out si Kuya Ray. Sorry... :(

It was a fun Saturday. And kahit alumni na kami, we still blended with the crowd (Ahem. LOL). Hope to see you again soon guys! :)

And nothing happened

2011-07-10T22:48:00.000+08:00

I've been denied of twice this week. The first was a dinner with a friend, which was supposed to be yesterday; the second fizzled as fast as it began and before I knew it, nothing came to pass this weekend. Sayang, I was really looking forward to that Saturday. You know what they say of planned social whatever? They never materialize! *Sigh.

And so, to make up, nag-aya lang ako ng mga superfriends to go to Mapua for the Frosh Week. Sana lang pwede sila. It's been a while since I last saw the guys. Great and smart guys, at that (Kaya Ninong dapat sumama ka! LOL).

^_~

TNB Editorial Board (with probationary staff) circa 2005. Please, please sana pwede kayo. See you on Saturday. :)

Rain, rain go away

2011-07-09T17:26:00.000+08:00

Nakakainis ang araw na ito. Paalis na dapat ako, pero di natuloy kasi ang lakas ng ulan. I hate the rain and the gloominess it brings. Di na nga maka-gimik, di pa maka-porma. Hay.

Ole, ole, ole!

2011-07-04T00:10:00.000+08:00

First time ko sa Rizal Memorial. First time ko din na nakapanood ng football game. At first time ko din nabasa ng ulan dahil sa game.

***

Mahirap kumuha ng tickets sa Azkals v Sri Lanka. Kasi naman, pagka-announce pa lang na available na, within an hour ubos na din. Nanghinayang na talaga ako at akala ko di na ako makakanood, pero buti na lang binigay ng ubod ng ganda kong pinsan ang extra tickets nya. Not one but two! Huh! In your face, Ticketnet!

Kahit sinabi ng PAGASA na uulan, umasa pa rin talaga kami na magiging maaraw. Wala kaming dalang payong, kasi bawal as per FIFA rules, or rain coat. Ang meron lang ako ay isang black jacket na napagtanto kong hindi naman pala waterproof nung kalakasan na ng ulan. Buti na lang may nag-magandang loob na alisin ang tarpaulin ni Piolo Pascual na nakasabit sa likod. Na siya namang naging panukob namin sa ulan. Shared with strangers. LOL.

Nung maka-goal na si Chieffy, wala na kaming pakialam sa ulan. Ah, talon lang, sige sigaw paaaaa! All that habang hawak namin si Papa P. Medyo nakalituhan nung second goal, kasi nga naman from our angle, mukhang Sri Lankan ang sumipa sa goal ng Pilipinas (Kaya siguro tinawag ng referee yun). But when James raised his fist before the crowd after a talk with the referee, we all shouted in jubilee. :D

Taken after the match officially ended. 4-0 win by the Philippines over Sri Lanka.

It was a great, great experience--the giant roving Philippine flag, the cheers, the wave, the rain. At kahit sa katawan na natuyo ang damit namin, keribels lang. Sayang nga lang ang dala naming flag ay literal na cute (Di kasi kasya sa bag ang malaking Philippine flag dito sa bahay.), at wala kaming face paint. Buti na lang madaling sundan ang mga chant ng Kahuleros.

Nakakapagod din. I had the a fun run in the morning and Azkals game in the afternoon. Can you just imagine the beating I did to my legs? That after running 5k, I had to stand for the entire football game because every thing in the bleachers was wet? And yeah, my throat hurts too. What the heck, I don't care. I'm dead tired. But happy. :)

Can't paint the world with rainbows

2011-07-02T18:04:00.001+08:00

Mabilis akong maapektuhan ng mga binabasa ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit, pero yun e. Kaya nga kahit hinanap ko pa nang bonggang-bongga ang The Prince ni Machiavelli, tinigil ko din halfway (It's just too damn amoral!). I never finished 48 Laws of Power (Kasi yung ibang laws, pang-evil person na). I only read a few pages of this book na parang pre-The Godfather (Can't remember the title, basta graphic yung read), of Violin (Anne Rice. Creepy and graphic kasi.From that day, I never read any of her titles), and I never touched a single book by Stephen King (The old man's name alone sends shivers down my spine.).

Siguro nga yun ang reason why I am more into reading news articles and features. Fiction has little place in me, which saddens me a bit. I've always wanted to write a screenplay (na yung format I have yet to decipher), with some good story and one hell of writing (At sabi nga ni Sir Dyoks, iwan ang copy sa Restaurant 1301 para may makakitang executive. LOL.). But I can't do that if I only know the world of journalism. My sensitivity towards those titles somehow backfires at me and that dream to be best friends with Carlos Palanca remains in limbo.

A writer is only good because of what he reads. What worries me is that right now, I can't make time to read a book. Much of what I do is too focused on learning the core principles of my career, which writing never actually is. :(

****

I feel stressed.

In general, I am. I don't want to dig into details, but to put it simply, I have no one to talk to. I haven't got in touch with my friend/therapist for a while (He's busy with Med school), which makes me well, a little depressed. My closest girl friend is temporarily living kilometers away, and she can't make it home once a week (which she usually makes time for) after packing her bags and leaving their house because of problems with her Mom.

Sad. It's just sad.

'A shadow always knows'

2011-06-27T11:24:00.001+08:00

Checklist. In no way related to this post. :P

It started with a cry of help, via Facebook, by a friend from school. Apparently, she was having problems with writing a speech for one of her subjects. She was finding it hard to start. The good old me, having an untarnished golden heart, offered my services to her. As goes with my SOP, I asked what the topic will be and when she needs the final version, then off I went to six hours of researching, conceptualizing, writing, editing and finishing touches. After some Facebook in between, I emailed the final copy past midnight. Some minutes were shamefully dedicated to chat. :P

Well, this is not the first time I wrote for somebody. There was that technical speech for my cousin and an inspirational speech for my speaker/friend's commencement. With that, I conclude:
I may have just started my career as a ghost writer. Next question, can I make money out of that? :)) Just asking, please don't kill me.

History won't judge the present

2011-06-23T00:28:00.000+08:00

I miss writing. No, not this kind of writing but the one that drains your brain and drives you nuts, because your article is two sentences short of that superliquid chain of thought. I miss the assignments, the deadlines, the slug lines, the by lines, the banging of heads against the nearest wall. I miss talking to people (important people at that). I miss cramming. I miss passing articles after the deadline (and getting the penalty). I miss my life. :( Before you think I'm one sadistic freak, I'll tell you in advance that I'm not. There's just something in what I used to do that gives me that 'high' (Good one, though. Sorry to disappoint. :P).

Sabi nila, ang high school daw ang pinakamasayang part ng schooling. On my part, mas masaya ako nung kolehiyo (Matali ka ba naman sa super strict na all girls high school kong mahal...). Anyway, masaya dahil sa Builder. Pero in a way, malungkot din dahil din sa Builder. I had to arrange my schedule every term so that I'll have time to attend to my duties with the paper without compromising my grades. That would mean terms of direct opposite schedules with my close friends (Pang-umaga sila, pang-gabi ako. Less time with them, more work for me). But they perfectly understood (And for that, I'm eternally grateful). Bumawi naman ako nung fourth year.

Sabi ni Lope, dalawang bagay ang ipinagmamalaki nya nung gumradweyt sya. One, is graduate sya ng Mapua. Pangalawa, dahil nalagpasan nya ang Quarterm. And I can't agree more. Quarterm ang academic calendar namin. Four terms a year, eleven weeks per term. Sundays are rest days. Pero nung first year, seven days kami pumapasok dahil sa NSTP. Sa 11 weeks, first week is for orientation, last week is finals; nine weeks lang talaga ang actual lecture, which is equivalent to 27 meetings for a three-unit subject. Sa 27 meetings na yun, di ka pa sigurado kung sisiputin ka ng prof or hindi, o kung mapapagtripan nyang hindi magturo dahil may kumalabit sa ankles nya. Kahit ako, hindi ko rin alam kung pano ko nalagpasan ang Quarterm. I'm just glad I did because that kind of pressure and pace prepared me for what the world has to offer.

***

Bumabagyo na naman. Lagi na lang gloomy ang weather. Kaka-depress. Sana naman maging okay na. Para awa na. T_T Note to self: Bawal magkasakit!

Let's go Italian

2011-06-12T14:33:00.000+08:00

My first memory of hearing an opera song was way, way back in my childhood, when a TV commercial had it as M&E for their product. I can't recall what the commercial was but what I do remember was the song, O Sole Mio, playing in the background. Fast forward to my teens, I used to sing the same song with my uncle every time he's home from Italy. We'll sing it loud and out of tune, as if we're on stage. Every time he's here, I'm always tempted to greet him with a top of lungs version of O sole mio. But I'm no Pavarotti, and neither is he, so we kept that memory in the banks because it gets quite embarassing when we sing that at our age. :))

There are a number of Italian songs I've grown to love (aside from The Prayer). Recently, what got me hooked was a version of Nella Fantasia from Sung Bong Choi, a contestant in Korea's Got Talent. Nella Fantasia would be very beautiful if I could write it in Italian. But the good old me knowing only ciao, pronto, and sordo in my Italian dictionary, I ditched the idea. Here is a perceptible version in English (Thank you, Wiki). I love the poetry in this piece.

In my imagination I see a fair world,
Everyone lives in peace and in honesty there.
I dream of souls that are always free,
Like the clouds that fly,
Full of humanity in the depths of the soul.

In my imagination I see a bright world,
Even the night is less dark there.
I dream of souls that are always free,
Like clouds that fly.

In my imagination there exists a warm wind,
That breathes on the cities, like a friend.
I dream of souls that are always free,
Like clouds that fly,
Full of humanity in the depths of the soul.

In case you haven't heard it in Italian, check Il Divo's version here.

There are a lot of good writings involved in an opera song's libretto (Not to forget the orchestra music too). They're simple and poetic, and most of all, they're not cheesy! I guess if we have something like this going in CCP, I'll watch it in a heartbeat. Oh man, I'm such a classic junkie. :P

One after the other

2011-06-06T22:38:00.002+08:00

I'm always affected whenever I read a story about twins. Lalo na kapag yung mga Siamese twins joined in the head (or in other parts of the body), or stories about a long lost twin finally finding the other. Minsan talaga naiisip ko, ang swerte ko dahil hindi ko kailangang pagdaanan ang ganun.

So I was browsing Yahoo and there was this story about twin friars dying on the same day, just hours after the other. Not only did they share the same vocation and eye impairment, they even shared the same cause of death (Talk about going extremes.). Then there was a documentary about Schizophrenia that I watched for my Psychology class during my sophomore year. Some minutes were dedicated to a case of a schizophrenic twin while his mentally fit twin brother looked after him. Then it made me think. What if the other twin will be schizophrenic too? And, remember the Aguirre twins? Their story is something I'll always reflect on.

Laging tinatanong sa akin, "So anong feeling ng may kakambal?" Wala naman ako masagot. Ano ba dapat? Ano ba ang ineexpect ng mga tao na isasagot ko? Ang tangi ko lang masasagot e, "Well..." Insert awkward pause here. "Di kami nagte-teleport." To which, I know they'll frown in amusement. For the sake of rhetorics, please, please allow me to ask back, "Ano naman ang feeling na walang kakambal?" It may sound rude to most people, but I don't know how else to put it other than that way. I've always wondered that (Hmm, ano nga ba?).

My sister and I are the same in very much the same way we are different. She prefers band aid solutions while I identify the problem. She loves arguing, I challenge her thinking. We chose courses in deep contrast with one another, and schools that are kilometers away from the other. I could have gone to her University and major in History too. But I've always wondered what would it'll be like to be in a different field, with my set of friends in a college I can call my own. That (and many others) would explain the choices I made in college, in career, in life.

I know many of you can't relate to this. I just hope I answered your question well. Now, now, will anyone be game enough to answer mine? :D

So stupid me

2011-06-04T22:56:00.000+08:00

There are some moments na di ko maiwasang isipin: Ang stupid ko. Let me expound...

Kanina. Lunch time. Hallway, sa labas ng Studio 4. Papunta kami ng opismate ko sa kabilang building dahil wala lang, lakad-lakad lang. Nung malapit na kami sa may access pass, medyo maraming nag-gagather na tao. E ako, ayoko sa mga grupo na bigla na lang sumusulpot out of nowhere, so derechong-derecho ang lakad ko tapos nag-tap ako ng ID, then nasa exit na ko. Yung opismate ko, naiwan nang konti. Nung nagtagpo na kami sa exit, sabi nya, "Nakita mo si Matteo (Guidicelli)? Lumingon pa sa atin ah." And I was like, WTF? BAKET DI KO SYA NAKITA? He said, "Ang bilis mo kasi." Paksyet naman, si Matteo na yun, binigo pa ko ng peripheral vision ko. Nakakainis. :( This is not the first time na may nag-comment sa peripheral vision ko. Dumadami na ang nagsasabi na para akong kabayo. Derecho lang ang tingin, walang pakialam sa paligid. (Maybe something really is so wrong with my eyes. Well, there is. I should start saving for that Lasik surgery. LOL.)

After one lunch. Hallway, sa may Studio 2. May advance taping ata ang Showtime nun. Naglalakad ako on the same hallway to get to the other building and buy some dessert. Walang ano-ano, nasalubong ko si Kuya Kim. Kasunod nya sina Jugs at Teddy. Makalipas ang ilang saglit,si Vhong naman. Tas nung lumingon naman ako sa may dressing room malapit sa Studio 4, nakita ko si Karylle. Sina Anne at Vice na lang ang kulang. At ako naman, syempre, shy, walang picture. No courage to ask them. :P

Eto heartbreaking. Same time, same hallway. Ininterview si Kim Chui ng crew ng SNN. Ako? Well, pinanood ko lang sya. As in tinitigan ko lang si Kim. Wala akong magawa. Kasi naman, nung time na yun, nanakawan ako ng phone (yun lang ang ginagamit ko pang-picture), at di ko ugali na magdala ng digicam. T^T

Labas ng Studio 6 dressing room. Azkals on Mornings @ ANC. A famous Someone asked me to take a picture of her and Neil Etheridge using her phone. Ako naman, nun lang nakahawak ng BB. Medyo nafigure out ko naman na press ko lang ang button at the middle to take a shot. So, 1, 2, 3, flash. Blurred picture. Toinks. Re-take. 1,2,3. Flash! Blurred ulit. At that moment, gusto kong batukan ang sarili ko. The same thing happened when I took a photo of a friend and Sam Milby, only to find out later that the picture I took was damn blurred. To add insult to the injury, my friend took a photo of me and Sam at pristine clarity. Focused till my last zit. To this day, it remains one of the incidents I will always apologize for.

Marami pa kong so-stupid-me moments. Pero ayoko na i-kwento, nakakahiya na. Hahaha.

Looking for something dumb to do

2011-05-30T16:15:00.001+08:00

~~Even the big guy gets it sometimes~~

Nakakabagot sa bahay, lalo na pag ikaw ang taong-bahay. Tas mag-isa ka lang, at wala pang cable TV dahil ang magaling naming cable provider ay tinopak na nang bonggang-bonnga (Nang-away na ko ng customer rep, nakakainis na e.).

Ano ba'ng meron sa mundo at kapag mag-isa ka, feeling mo talunan ka? Di ko alam, pero parang nag-connive ang universe to bring some crap on me today. Bukod sa walang cable, binili ni Mother dear mula sa akin ang red wine na binili ko Saturday night (which was meant to be enjoyed today by a friend and yours truly) to serve as a gift to someone I don't know. Sayang, I chilled it pa naman. At syempre, wala akong maka-chat. Nasa work ang mga super friends ko. Sigh.

I am left with absolutely nothing to do. Ayoko naman lumabas (Walang peraness). Wala pa kong bagong libro o magazine na mababasa (Kasi di pa naman ako bumibili ulit). Ayoko din manood ng TV (Analog free TV sucks). Maybe I should start reading the RH bill for a start? :)) Geez. This boredom is killing me.

Anyway, my friend is coming over to save me from this paranoia. God knows I'll be brain-dead if she doesn't. Hahahaha.

Rainy days ahead

2011-05-24T21:00:00.000+08:00

Summer's officially over. ~~Yeah, that sucks. Di man lang nakapag-swimming. Chos. :(~~ That means I have to expect flooding after some heavy rain. It also means di ko marerecycle ang maong ko (na kadalasan three wears before mapunta sa laundry) ~~that sucks more~~, obligadong magdala ng payong at dahil storm season na, araw-araw iuuwi ang jacket. Oo nga pala, lagi ring soaked ang Chucks ko. Haaayyyy.

My second brush with some downpour was last night, on the way home. Saktong naglalakad ako palabas ng office. Nung una, maliit lang ang patak but no, unti-unting nag-build up ang force. Nag-level up nung nakasakay na ko, tas tumodo nung nasa Blumentritt na. Maaaaannnn, di ko pa naman kabisado ang mga lubak sa Blumentritt at kalbaryo pa na walang street light kapag gabi. Ang mega nakakainis pa ay may leak yung payong ko (kahit medyo brand new pa), kaya imbes na tuyo ako pauwi, e wala, parang sumugod din ako sa ulan. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

More rainy days ahead. Might as well get a survival kit ready (They're saying the end of the world will be on October, just after saying it should have been on May 21.).

***

Let me cap this with a quote from Black Butler,

The pitch black sea, reflecting the countless twinkling stars, is dyed red, like my favorite roses.

Stay safe...and dry. :)

When the going gets tough, just say, "Happy fiesta!"

2011-05-16T19:25:00.001+08:00

Straight duty ako last Saturday. Nag-time in ako ng May 14, 8.30am (Blame the traffic-less road and the paranoia of Pacman's welcome parade clogging Manila's streets) then nag-out ako ng May 15 7am. After that, umuwi ako ng Batangas, diretso from my duty, with only two hours of sleep and no breakfast. While on the road, I cursed everyone who delayed my travel in my head, hopefully wishing it will speed up my bus. As it turns out, it wasn't all that effective. Hindi umalis ang bus until 20 minutes after I was on-board. It was the longest 20 minutes of my life. :(

Praning pa rin ako habang nagco-commute. Di ako makatulog kasi I-was-scared-na-malampasan-ko-ang-stop-ko-dahil-sa-sobrang-tulog moments. I had to content my body with the intermittent sleep I had. Peste, dapat kasi may kotse at driver na ko. LOL.

Fiesta sa hometown ko last Sunday. Pero fiesta din sa lugar namin dito sa Manila on the same day (Talk about double celebrations). But on any given Sunday, we (my sisters and I) will always choose Batangas over Manila. No questions asked. Sayang naman ang bahay namin dun, di na namin natirhan ever since we moved here, so if we can make some time, we spend some quality time there.

Birthday din ng isang Tito at isang Tita ko. Yes, they're both named after the town's patron saint. He is Isidro, she is Isidra and fortunately, hindi naman sila ang mag-asawa. Tito Cid is the husband of Mommy Sid's sister. Lunch was served at home and dinner was at Tito Cid's.

As usual, masaya na naman ang mga Tito at Tita namin. Ngayon lang ulit nila makikita ang mga tanging nieces nila. Kaming tatlong magkakapatid lang kasi ang mga babae nilang pamangkin kaya naman pag nagkikita kami, mega hug at mega beso ang drama namin palagi. Ang palagi nilang linya, "Ah sa wakas, naka-halik din sa babae." Wahahaha.
***

Forgive me. Di ko makita ang computer cable ng phone ko (na ginamit pangkuha ng pictures) so di ako makapag-upload (As usual, nagkalimutan ulit na dalhin ang award winning na digicam. Hahahaha). Nasiyahan pa naman kami nung dumaan sa bahay ang mga dragon dancers (they said na from Ongpin daw sila. Conio much? XD ), this year lang ata meron nun. The previous years, we only had musikeros on the streets. Pero ngayon, nag-level up na. Sosyal. :D

***

Found it!

Happy fiesta!

The "great" Showtime experience

2011-05-10T07:49:00.000+08:00

Yes, I will be sarcastic. Sa title lang. Bwahahaha.

***

Isang araw, nag-check ako ng email sa office. Naka-receive ako ng corporate email from someone. E ako naman, sige, open lang. Nung binuksan ko, aba, nanalo daw ako ng Showtime passes. E di tuwang-tuwang naman ako, sinigaw ko pa nga sa office e. Tapos tiningnan ko yung date. Walang jo, April 23, Black Saturday. Dan-dan-dan-dan...Tumawa na lang ako at tinawagan ang local ng in-charge sa passes kasi pwede naman daw pa-resched yung mga natamaan ng Holy Week. E di pina-resched ko ng May 9. :)

A week before, kinuha ko na sa Corp Comm ang passes. Tas nag-text brigade na ko. GM kung GM, as in. Para di ako mahirapan, pina-contest ko na lang sa mga super friends ko ang natitirang tatlong passes. Ang unang tatlong magrereply sa tanong na, "Ano ang full name ng Ombudsman na nag-resign nung April 30?" ang bibigyan ko ng pass. Hindi ko muna sinabi ang reward para exciting. Harharharhar.

May nag-reply naman, at tama din ang sagot nila. The problem was they can't join me on May 9 because it was a work day. I asked them to take a leave, kasi minsan lang yun at di ako makakasali ulit sa raffle for the employees for the next six months. Lahat ng tinanong ko, hindi pwede. I asked family, friends from college, from Samsung, pati mga kapit-bahay, but no, hindi sila pwede. Silang lahat. Nakakapanlumo. I swear, the next time I will win passes, sa kahit anong show, I will never, ever invite na. Papamigay ko na lang. Humpf. :( Anyway, come May 9, Lhudie was with me to watch the show live. Yes, dalawa lang kami. Bakit ba, walang basagan ng trip!

Cut the long story short (Andami nangyari before we can go to the studio. As in, parang doomed from the very beginning ang pagpunta ko sa Showtime.), nung nasa loob na kami, sinundan ko lang ang crowd. Tas naupo kami sa harap, dun sa harap ng stage, sa tabi ng Camera 1 (yung kumukuha ng medium shot ng mga host pag spiels). It turns out para sa TFC subscribers pala yung pwesto. E kami walang kamalay-malay na naupo lang. Wala nang mas gaganda pa sa pwesto namin. Wahahaha.

When I said doomed from the beginning, I really meant it. Muntik na mag-back out si Lhudie, wala kaming masakyan ng taxi kaya commute lang ~~at na-disgrasya pa ang shoes ni Lhudie ng isang trike~~, bumabagyo pa sa Manila (wala namang ulan pero sobrang mahangin, sira ang hair namin. Anyway di rin ako nakapag-blow dry so sira talaga ang herr ko. Hay.) and all. At walang battery ang phone ko kasi wala kaming kuryente simula early Sunday morning, so wala akong pang-picture. It was only after the show was over that the thought hit me: I should have brought my sister's digicam. Oh darn. :(

200th

2011-05-07T21:25:00.000+08:00

Dahil seryoso ang mga post ko lately, gusto ko naman mag-change topic. Sa dalawang readers ko, light lang tayo, mga friends ha. :)

***
Manila heat. Can't get enough of it!

Yan ang isang malaking kasinungalingan. Napapagod na ko sa sobrang init. As in. Summer kung summer dito sa city. Wala pang mga trees pang-alleviate ng init at magbigay ng hangin. Ang sad tuloy. Kapag naglalakad ako papuntang terminal ng Espana, feeling ko isa akong grilled meat. Or oven-baked croissant. Nakakamura ang init. Maygad. Spare me of the extra dose of UV rays. Please, please. Ok na po ako sa morena kong balat. Di ko na po gustong ng extra tan at sapat na po ang melanin sa aking skin. Juice mio po pabor. Parang oven paglabas ng opis. Ang malupit pa, labas-pasok ako sa init at lamig ng opisina at ng panahon. Congratulations to me, sakit na naman ang abot ko.

Ngayon lang talaga ako napilitan na buksan ang payong na binili ko nung March pa. As in hindi ko talaga ginalaw yun dahil sa katamaran na magligpit (Ayoko kasi magulo ang near perfect na fold nung Fibrella. Sayang e). Pero no my friends. Talagang no choice ako sa init. Ayoko magka-skin cancer dahil sa katamaran.

Naalala ko tuloy nung isang tanghali na hinanap namin ang Fujifilm sa Quezon Ave para magpa-print ng pictures para sa office. Nakalimutan kong mag-alis ng jacket at naglakad ako sa ilalim ng init ng araw nang, yes, nagka-jacket. At naka-zip pa yun ha. Wahahaha. Yun ang afternoon ng pumalo sa 36 degrees ang Manila, pero kami, sige, go lang. Lakad to max! Ayun pagbalik ng malamig na opis, hilong-hilo kami sa sudden temperature change.

Siguro naman hindi ako nag-iisa sa aking mga hinaing. At siguro naman kapag pinagsama-sama ang aming mga panalangin, e matutupad din yun ni Papa God. At natupad yun kanina lang habang nasa jeep pauwi. Ang lakas ng ulan, super. Like, yung kalsada sa harap ng bahay na nung Ondoy lang binaha, nagbaha ulit tonight. Creepy nga lang kasi, imagine nyo na lang ang eksena ko kanina:
Pinara ko yung jeep a few steps from home. Maulan, baha, mahangin ~~(may payong ako, yehey)~~, basa ang pants and shoes, tapos biglang kumidlat. Tas namatay lahat ng ilaw sa street. Tas pagdating ko ng bahay, di ko ma-unlock ang pinto dahil hindi ko makita ang keyhole (Madilim nga kasi. Nabangga pa nga ako sa something e). Ang tagal ko din dun, tipong naging best friends kami ng tubig-ulan at hangin. Pag-akyat ko, candle lit ang bahay. BONGGA, parang haunted house!

Mabuti na lang hindi nag-extend hanggang hapunan ang blackout. Anyway, the air isn't as humid as the past few weeks. That's one reason to celebrate. :D

***

Sa lahat ng mga nag-influence sa akin na magsulat, sa lahat ng subjects ng post ko, sa PLDT DSL, sa Blogger, sa gumawa ng magandang template ko, at higit sa lahat, sa minamahal kong dalawang regular readers, maraming salamat! Here's to my 200th. Now that's another reason to celebrate. ;)

***

PS: I have three Showtime passes for May 9. Yung interested, bigyan nyo lang ako ng one year supply ng Campbell's Mushroom soup, Barilla pasta at Yellow Cab pizza. O kaya one year supply ng Sbarro. Game? :P

They're not God

2011-05-01T15:57:00.000+08:00

Minsan naiisip ko, bakit ba pagsusulat ang kaya ko? Pwede namang mas obvious na talent di ba? Kunwari, sumayaw, kumanta, umarte. Para derecho artista na. E di mayaman na sana ako. Wahahaha.

Sometimes, it really gets me thinking. Bakit ba ang tataas ng sahod ng mga artista? Bayad ba yun sa popularity, influence or loss of privacy? Kasama ba sa bayad ang mga batikos ng mga tabloid, ang chismis tungkol sa buhay nila every weekend, maintenance ng skin kay Vicky Belo? Or all of the above?

Minsan, nabo-bother din ako sa pag-"idolize" ng mga fans sa mga artista to the point na kelangan nila magpa-picture sa bawat isa sa kanila. Na kelangan nila manalo sa isang pa-contest sa Facebook to win a date with a famous TV personality. That these fans wanted to follow them on Twitter and be updated with the going-ons with their lives. It's surreal, really.

Now, I ask. How come? How come we have become so engrossed with their lives? Will it make a difference in ours if we knew what they ate for dinner, or what music is playing on their Ipod? Tell me a ton of reasons why you are and I will still ask, "Why do you worship them so much?"

I mean, they're not God. They're just humans. Just like you and me. They're just fortunate to have fame and fortune, but unfortunate enough to be everybody's property. That's the life they live.

Ok, guilty din ako. Nagpa-picture din ako. Pero tatlo lang. Isang senador, isang football player, isang artista. Siguro nga kasi araw-araw din ako dumadaan sa mga studio, kaya the stars lost their mystique on me. Pag tinitingnan ko sila, ang nakikita ko, pare-pareho lang kaming empleyado. Ibang department lang sila.

Going back, it is quite fascinating how we, as a nation, are as religious in Church as we are on Showbiz. Maybe that deserves a study. Maybe they already did. Well, will we be as religious in following the law? Just asking.

Withdrawal

2011-04-23T00:59:00.000+08:00

WAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

Nababaliw na ko dito sa bahay. Bakasyon nga, wala namang cable TV. Some stupid truck tripped the line along the main street. Although I called customer service already, their crew won't repair it until Saturday because today is, ding-ding-ding, a holiday. That's some crap for me. Enjoy contemplating on holy week, my dear mistress! Ugh. However, I'm not all that unfortunate. I'm stuck with a stonehenge, ghost-y, snowy, distorted analog free TV, with 2 milliseconds of lip sync error on ETC. Ni hindi ko pwede buksan ang bintana dahil lumalabo ang mga channels when I do!

Sigh. I just want to bang my head on the nearest concrete wall. :(

Don't be

2011-04-21T01:51:00.000+08:00

Don't be someone I never knew.
Don't wallow in sadness.
Don't be overshadowed by grief.

Even when loneliness starts to sink in,
Don't be the man I never knew.

Even when everyone says age is fast catching up,
Don't be the man I never knew.

Even when it is a struggle to stay sane,
Don't be the man I never knew.

Because you do what is right.
Because you think more of others' sake.
Because you're objective and open-minded.
Because you're composed in stress.

Because you're one of the few I trust.
Because you're one of the few I believe in.

Just don't be.

Literally blurred

2011-04-13T23:53:00.000+08:00

I remember one lunch when we were talking about contact lenses. AJ, Adi, Kaw and I are having a contest of sorts kung sino ang may pinakamalabong mata to justify wearing the contacts. Syempre, sino pa ba nanalo, e di ako. Wahaha. Wala na atang mas malabo sa mata ko sa mga taga-panood ng TV sa office. San ka nakakita ng taga-QC na mega malabo ang mata? Anyway, sabi ni AJ, when the grade of the eyes goes beyond -2.00 (Adi, tama ba?), partially blind na daw. Ayon sa huling check up ko, ang grade ng eyes ko ay -5.50 plus astigmatism. Hirit naman ako, "If I am partially blind, that makes me disabled. Kung disabled ako, pwede kong i-avail ang mga special parking spaces for the disabled?" Sagot ni AJ, "Hindi, mas maganda kung may discount ka pa sa jeep. Manong, disabled po." Ay, panalo! Hahaha.

Ayun, I'm having problems with my glasses for two days na. Right eye lang naman ang may problem. Left eye is okay. I don't know lang if this will persist (Syempre, pinagdadasal ko na lumipas din.) although I had an "allergy" with my right eye too (last December), and that took three whole months to fully recover. Di ko lang alam if this is an "aftershock" or it's an entirely different thing altogether.

Eto ang malaking twist: I just had my routine check up two weeks ago, and pinapalitan ko na ng lens ang glasses ko to correct my vision. But lo and behold, baka kelangan ulit magpalit ng lente.

Till the 200th

2011-04-10T00:15:00.003+08:00

Three years ago, this page started out as something I was just checking out. Blogging was kinda new at that time, and my friends were bugging everyone at the office to try "this new it thing." So ako, nakiuso. Nag-isip, nagsulat, nagpost. This page was something like a break from school, from the paper, from the world. It was refreshing to do something that wasn't about the directivity and effective isotropic radiated power, or deadlines and grammar and capitalization. It was just refreshing. Period.

My blog's name is a pun. While siomai is a favorite, happysiomai is something I thought would be cool to have as a password after my school's online enrollment system said "strong" when I was asked what my password will be (I changed my password mid-third year. WTH, it doesn't matter XD). Anyway, I wrote more than usual after I graduated, which is a bit ironic. I find it weird that I continued doing this even if my closest friends, erstwhile in the blogger world, have done otherwise.

I'm not from a clan of writers. Well, technically. My Ate is a professional, she majored it in UP. And my younger sister was a member of a literary group in UST (They call it TWG), and won several awards from The Varsitarian. While I, on the meanwhile, am nothing compared to their resume. I have nothing to show, nothing to be proud about. All I can tell you is I am self-taught. That's all.

Words are swords unsheathed. They can prick at the slightest and they can make somebody's heart bleed. This blog is self-indulgent because I'd rather write about my misadventures than find happiness over someone else's (That's just rude and nasty.). In the end, I always wrote something about me, hoping that from the previous 192 posts (posted or otherwise :P), my two readers can see my soul into it.

Now, make it 193.

Tomorrow

2011-04-03T12:04:00.000+08:00

Written for a friend. Something that somehow speaks for what I'd like to say for quite sometime.
Violent reactions are welcome. Please don't kill me. :P
---

Much been said about Rizal’s infamous quote, “Ang kabataan ang pag-asa ng bayan.” I won’t give you that. I believe you’ve heard enough of it. So I’m giving you something a little different. Let me begin by telling a story about a mother bird, her eggs and a snake. At this moment, I know you’re thinking, “Nah, this is just another story telling session.” But, this is not another fable, I assure you. So, please lend me your senses. It will only be for a while.

High up the crotch of a tree, a mother bird sat on the eggs in her nest. Then she suddenly noticed a python slowly slithering towards her. The poor bird thought, what could she do to protect her eggs from the snake?

A monkey came, saw the situation and told the mother bird, “Don’t be afraid. I’ll get rid of that python; I’ll throw stones at him!” “But then, you’ll break my eggs,” the mother bird said. Along rumbled a big elephant. He too, saw the dangerous situation and assured the mother bird, “Relax and stop crying. I’ll get rid of that python; I’ll pull that tree out of the ground.” “Wait a minute,” said the mother bird. “Then, you’ll break all my eggs.”

With that, the mother bird came to the conclusion that the giants of the forest were not able to drive away the python without breaking her eggs. Suddenly, she hit upon an idea, just as she was ready to abandon the eggs. She would ask the ants to help her. Then thousands of them came running up the tree trunk, covered the python completely from nose to tail tip, and left nothing of him except his skin and skeleton. “Bravo!” said the mother bird. “Now my young are safe and I can get back to work.”

The heroes of the story are neither the monkey nor the elephant. Giants as they were, they were held helpless of the situation. In the end, it was the ants who saved the day. Yes, those little things that crawl on your unfinished candies after recess. And nobody thought they can.

We live in a world where youngsters like you are not expected to do anything. You’re just expected to go to school, finish elementary, go to high school, finish high school, go to college, finish college then work. That’s it. Then let me ask you these questions. Does it sound fun? Does it fascinate you that nobody believes you can do anything besides going to school? Do you feel satisfied with that thought?

If you answered yes, then I am gravely saddened. You are young, energetic and vibrant. It would be such a waste seeing your dynamic personalities fade in school alone! I’ll play guidance counselor for a while and strongly advise you: Prove them wrong. Rise above low expectations and prove them wrong. Show them that your generation is more than the PSP, Twitter, Facebook, DoTA and Justin Bieber. Do hard things. Stretch your capabilities beyond your limitations. Do what is hard. Achieve what is great. Know that your capacity to meet the challenge is limitless. Let nothing stop you from conquering the world. Let your spirit spread like wildfire. Let your voices resound even in the farthest corners of the world. The sky awaits your taking. Be a good friend. Love your country. Strive to be happy.

Stand up for something, even if it means faltering along the way. The road will be rugged, I am sure, and you may fall, stumble and bleed. But, young as you are, always remember that rough seas make a sailor strong. You will never be the best if you had not experienced the worst. Carry on with your journey. Just carry on. You are all destined to do great things.

If you answered no, then there’s nothing we should be talking about. Kidding aside, I am congratulating you more than I’ll ever would. Thank you for realizing your potential; that you are indeed MORE than the pampered and sheltered kids, more than meets the eye, more substantial and more intelligent than the world perceives you to be.

So what will you do tomorrow? Will you be spending the vacation running across the fields of your parents’ hometown? Will you enroll in summer classes, learn a new sport or play an instrument? Will you do some volunteer work? Will you help your parents clean the house tomorrow? I know for sure I can’t answer for you on that. But, let me tell you this: Tomorrow, you will march to new beginnings. Tomorrow, you will reach greater heights. Tomorrow, you will start carving your niche towards becoming this nation’s most distinguished architects and engineers, hoteliers and restaurateurs, businessmen and accountants. Tomorrow, YOU will be the builders of the world.

They say you guys can only do so much with your little hands. I say, you can do too much! Sometimes, we, adults, need your little hands to pat our heads and humble our goals. March on to greater heights and make your country proud!

Note to self

2011-03-27T13:01:00.000+08:00

Because I have to reserve the writing genes to help a friend today, I give you my shortest post ever. Let this be a helpful reminder to me as I brace for another week of misadventures:

Graze into the sun, graze on it lightly
For its rays burn the eyes and its heat scorches the skin.
Graze into the sun, graze on it lightly
Before darkness sweeps the sky and steals your sight away.

Ciao!

Oh good Lord...

2011-03-19T22:04:00.001+08:00

March couldn't be any more crappier than this.

The week that was, to say the the least, was horrific. Que horror to the nth power. Even now as I recall the tasks at hand for the coming week, I feel like Death has his scythe on my neck 10 cm nearer everyday.

Recap: I lost my phone. Plain and simple. I suspect I lost it on the way home, but truth be told, hindi ko talaga alam kung saan. When I checked my bag the moment I got home, wala na. Disappearing act na. I tried calling, but the operator said, "The subscriber cannot be reached." I called the office to double check, baka andun lang at naiwan ko. Pero wala talaga. Hay. Ang katangahan nga naman...

The next day, my boss told me she was calling my number to relay some very important message for activities on Monday. The phone was ringing daw, so she sent a message. Ang malupit, nag-reply pa ang nakakuha ng "Sino 'to?" When she told me the story, I just wanted to die (The nerve of that bitch.). The most heart breaking part was when I went to the Engineering HR to get some documents and the HR In-charge asked if I can text my boss to confirm some info. When he asked, "Matetext mo ba si Ma'am, tanong mo kung ganito, ganyan," it was like he pierced my heart ten million times.

I felt Death's scythe's 20cm nearer by the second.

To cap the week, I have to go to the office on Monday for some training. Oh good Lord. It's just mid-March and I feel more misadventures are coming my way. Geez, just shoot me. Shoot me now. *Pun intended* XD

No OT but your mind

2011-03-12T23:35:00.000+08:00

This is one of those days that I want to go out and just make muni-muni somewhere. Or have some wine with a friend. Or listen to some Rachmaninoff or Vivaldi. The unfortunate fact that I never got to do any makes the week even crappier. *Heave a loud sigh here*

Problems, they just never end. You solve one, another comes next. It is always a test of skill and talent. Almost always and ALWAYS the survival of the fittest. Feeling like a piece of junk is reality on the side ; that's the price you pay to hone your craft.

And I echo: There'll be no other question but survival, no test but that of skill, no *OT but your mind. We will be measured not by numbers but by character.

Crap would have to be the perfect word for the week. Madaming nangyari na ayoko na maalala. Tuwing bubuksan ko ang Inbox ko sa Gmail, ayokong tingnan ang mga unread. Ayokong gumawa ng mga dapat gawin, ayokong simulan. Basta ayoko. Pakshet, bakit ko pa kasi naisip na i-send sa Gmail ko ang mga reports na tatapusin? Ayan tuloy, ayokong masilayan muna sa ngayon ang Gmail ko. Ang rest day ay rest day, hindi work day. :P

Ewan. Bahala na si Lord. I entrust my fate to the Powers-That-Be of this ultimately capitalist world.

***

The echoing part was a direct quote from my column in 2008, which served as a response to a column hater. That was back in the days. What happened during that time, I graciously put behind, down and down under, in a place dark and cold, further and colder than the North Pole. Remembering the whole thing just makes me re-live the whole thing again. Oh crap.

*OT is Old Testament. The Mapuan context to old tests (or more often lab reports, data sheet and assignments na may computed values ng matatalinong genuis na classmates) which serve as reference to the next batch or the next class. Gets? Hehe

Do not go gentle into that good night

2011-03-06T10:37:00.000+08:00

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Though art more lovely and temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this and this gives life to thee.

That, my friend, is Sonnet 18, one of Shakespeare's best known sonnets, one of only two I know by heart. I posted this after my sister made kwento that her professor in Grad school was quoting the first lines of Thomas Gray's An Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard. In response to his constant quoting of literary greats, they would convert Elizabeth Barrett Browning in third person POV (How do WE love thee?/Let US count the ways...), recite it in chorus before the professor who's walking innocently in the hallways, and would do it every time they'd see him.

Wala, kakamiss lang ang English lit. I miss poetry. I miss literature. *Sigh. So here's my twisted version of another favorite:

I do not go gentle into that good night.
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
I rage, I rage at the dying of light...
My blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay.
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray
I rage, I rage, against the dying of light.

I know I didn't give this excerpt any justice but I was just mesmerized by the thought that even my big bosses were quoting Dylan Thomas. Important note: The original still beats the hell out of this version. Somehow, Thomas always finds a way in my thoughts. I do not go gentle into that good night. :)

Because "Eastwood is overrated"

2011-02-27T20:18:00.001+08:00

Flashback. 2009. One of my review mates, Jared, and I made this "pact" that we'll have coffee after the board exam is over. Parang wala, pang-chill lang. We were in the same situation back then--juggling work and review while preparing for the October 2009 boards. Come October of that year, our plan didn't materialize. We were both busy with our jobs.

February 2011. This Sunday morning. I was sitting lazily at home, watching TV, when I received a phone call. It was Jared. He was checking if I was okay for coffee. Now, nataranta naman ako kasi hindi ako prepared. Although we had a talk on my birthday na Sunday yung coffee, di ko inexpect na THIS Sunday pala. When he asked kung san pwede at malapit sa aming dalawa, ang mega sagot, syempre, SM San Lazaro. My go-to place because "we got it all for you." Ahahahahaha. Sa sobrang taranta ko, nung nagtanong ng time si Ja, sabi ko meet kami ng 11.30am. It was 10am na! Na-realize ko lang yun nung tumingin ako sa relo after the call. But oh well, ilang tumbling lang, nasa SM na ko. Kaya go, sige, aja! Pabilisan maligo at magprepare. I made it before 11.30. Kamon, I won't be late sa time na mismong ako ang nag-set. Herherherher.

We had lunch first, then coffee. The tab's on Ja. Although I insisted I pay for the coffee (kasi sya din ang nagbayad ng lunch), hindi nya ko pinansin at sya pa din ang nagbayad. Mayaman na ang friend ko. Negosyante na kase. LOL. I thanked him naman, which is the least thing I can do for such a gesture. We chatted for quite sometime, our topics ranging from the past, present, and future, basta, anything under the sun. And, I must say that there are very, very few people with whom I can talk to in the same tone as I did with Jared.

My friend's a smoker now and I'm trying to convince him to quit. His answer, "Maybe tomorrow." I just shrugged. Wala, choice nya pa din yun. Ang magagawa ko lang ay magpa-alala. When he asked the last time I had a vacation, sabi ko di ko na matandaan. "You really need a vacation," was what he said. Tuloy, nag-aaya ng Baguio sa summer. Now that is tempting... :D

Cheers not to van Winkle

2011-02-19T21:47:00.000+08:00

I usually get into thinking that we are supposed to do great things in our lives. Something that is bound to change the way we do things, the way we see things. I mean, what would become of this world if not for the brains behind Google, Youtube, and Facebook? If not for Bardeen, Brattain, and Shockley? Or Einstein, Galileo, and Aristotle? These people dared conventions and made their own standards, in the same way that Mozart, Haydn, and Beethoven did not only compose classical music--they invented it.

The world is but a blur to me now. A sea of The Wandering Jews. No, more like a sea of Rip van Winkle. We get on with our lives, we keep moving forward. Then one day we wake up, realizing our skin's wrinkled, our hair long, our clothes old and tattered while the rest of the world stares back blankly, asking who we are.

I don't intend to be like that.

It has to wait

2011-02-13T14:40:00.000+08:00

One night, while on a ride home, bigla ko na lang naisip ang mga bagay na trip ko lang gawin. As in trip lang. So, here's the list of my very, very absurd "dreams" which will take me another lifetime to complete:

1. Sumabit sa jeep.
2. Maglakad nang naka-crutches for one full week, may injury man o wala.
3. Magpadala ng flowers sa sarili at ipa-deliver sa office. The card will say, "Je t'aime, mi amor." XD
4. Walk on 4-inch heels for a day. (Although I tried this once, pero di ko kinaya. 50 meters pa lang, gusto ko na umupo.)
5. Umattend ng party at mag-feeling na JS prom ko yun. (Sorry, di ako nag-JS ever. Am from an all girls high and the nuns despise the prom, like it was the work of the devil altogether.)
6. Talk in British English at magkunwaring balikbayan.

Ok yan muna. Wala pa kong naiisip na absurd na gagawin. :))

****

Come next week, my ideal shift will be over. I am moved to the 12-8pm shift starting Feb. 15.

Now, wala namang problem sa akin yun. Work is just a few kilometers away. What I'm worried about is the amount of sunshine I'll get at that hour, given the distance I'm walking from one terminal to the other. Not to mention the scorching heat of summer. It's mid-February but summer's here early. In Manila, that translates to waves and waves of heat. E tamad akong magbukas ng golden umbrella kaya nga lagi lang akong naka-shades pag mainit sa umaga. Pero now, no choice na. Ayoko kaya magka-skin cancer.

My change of shift brought yet again the undying, immortal, and omnipotent topic of what to do on my spare time. Hay, akala ata nila hindi ko din naiisip yun.

****

New hires will be hanging around, probably by March. But they won't be joining in the actual operations until April. The 12-8pm shift is bound to change. Until then, I'll be hanging on. Oh Malparida, why do thoust leave this soul with a such heavy heart? :p

Hell hath no fury like a writer scorned

2011-02-07T16:31:00.000+08:00

It doesn't matter how much I whine about this day or the past week. Pero ayoko lang talaga ng mga taong walang magawa kungdi mang-istorbo. At sa rest day ko pa. Naku, Kuya, nagkamali ka ng kinulit.

Ayoko sa lahat ang...

1. Tinatawagan ako ng mga hindi ko kilala. Effort na nga ang sinagot ko ang tawag na di nag-register ang number, dahil pinagbibigyan ko pa dahil baka kaibigan kita at natripan mo lang pala na magpalit ng SIM. Pero, kung di tayo magkakilala at iistorbohin mo lang ang pagbabasa ko ng Black Butler, hindi ako magdadalawang isip na ilagay ang number mo sa Reject list ko.

2. Pinamimigay ang number ko. Dude, kaibigan kita. At binigay ko ang number ko para tayo ang mag-usap. Hindi ung mga kaibigan mo na trip lang akong i-text, tawagan, at lalong hindi para ipamigay sa mga networking ek ek na hindi ko trip. At least kung tatawagan nyo ko, pwede bang business approach? Direct to the point at walang kung ano-anong palabok? Irate na ko at nang-istorbo ka, andami mo pang paligoy-ligoy. Wala akong panahon makipaglokohan sa mga taong immature at gusto lang aksayahin ang prepaid credits ko. At wag na wag mo akong tatawagan habang nanonood ako ng Mara Clara. I'll unleash some lashing you will never forget.

3. Ayoko sa mga jejemon. I equally despise the texter and the speaker because to me, you're trying too hard. I don't f*cking need your messages messing along the most important ones in my inbox. And please get your tongues straight and enroll grammar lectures on UPLB Comm Arts Soc. You'll learn a thing or two and maybe after ten years, we could talk (if you can speak straight English by then).

Oo, masungit ako. Isnabera ako. Dahil ayoko sa mga taong gustong aksayahin ang oras ko. Ayoko sa mga edukadong umaarteng walang pinag-aralan. Try nyo magtrabaho para naman may pagkaabalahan kayo. Hmp.

When I open the fortune cookie...

2011-02-07T14:15:00.002+08:00

Marami akong dapat gagawin ngayon. Madami as in. Pero dahil may kaibigang nangangailangan, I ditched all that to help her. It wasn't much, but I put the list to a halt because I know I could do those things next week.

The year is looking good. Well, so far. My feng shui predictions tell that too. And somehow, I feel, 2011 is a good year. Here's the 2011 prediction for all dragons out there.

Dragon Fortune in 2011:

This year for the dragon, you seem to gain many lucky star plus the evil star is minimize. Therefore this is a good year ahead for you. There will be many nobility that will come to you, advance performance at work but there will be damage cause by some people around. You should make more communication with others and improve interpersonal relationship, career development will be more favorable. For the business people, you will get the chance to meet honored person’s support, wealth is very smooth, you can see a return on your investment. Love life is smooth, sweet and warm. Health need to prone to insomnia, gastrointestinal discomfort or breathing problems. To avoid funeral this year.

Dragon Career in 2011:

This year work get easier and more efficient for the dragon. Together from your efforts and supports from others, you will be able to receive fame and fortune in the Year of the Rabbit, things get extremely well. But sometimes when you get extremely well and smooth, you may seem to inevitably provoke jealousy and destruction, so when dealing with colleagues you should be more humble to avoid people from thinking that you are over the top and bring down your good deeds. For those that are into investment, you will be able to gain some good progress but do not take it too lightly from your own success, you will still need to listen and take advise from people around you.

Dragon Wealth in 2011:

In the Year of the Rabbit’s, fortunes steadily goes upward, good income, but because the health status of this year is not ideal, resulting in health issues that may cause you to spending too much, missed a lot of money making opportunity. This year you must learn financial management, at the wealth of good times, you also do not spend too much money. You should be cautious and save for a rainy day. For people in the financial sector, you may encounter some issue with monetary upon meeting the villains in the field. You have to always study clearly before making a decision. In addition, you should not be a guarantor this year in order to avoid loss of money.

Dragon Love in 2011:

Love luck is good this year, especially the single men and women you will very likely meet someone desirable, you can take part in more social activities, give yourself more opportunities. But marriage matter, you may not deal with it too easily, have clear discussion with each other and make sure that you have good understanding and patience for each other’s character and personality, not by the first impression to impulsive decisions, otherwise there would be more trouble. For the attached, relationship is smooth and warm. If you can make more effort to add more sparks for the couple will be good.

Dragon Health in 2011:

In the Year of the Rabbit, the dragon will be in need of attention in the health situation, because this resistance is weak, prone to problems, therefore there is a need for you to be cautious on your diet and exercise more, with special attention to gastrointestinal problems, you should be careful with what you eat. Do not take the uncooked food to avoid stomach upset. For those that drive, you should pay attention to traffic safety, in order to avoid disaster which may spill some blood. Female dragon individual health is not ideal, with particular attention to gynecological diseases, go for examination on a regular basis, early detection, early treatment by the doctor.

(Credits go to Google search. Nah, just kidding.)

Generally, I agree with some them. Save for the health forecast (which I know will be an issue in the months to come) and the love chuva. LOLZ. The first month of the year, I was sick. And it was a week before my scheduled medical. And just this month, parang babalik pa ata. Waaah. T_T And I have to have something checked. Pangit, pangit talaga ang year na ito para sa health ko.

86th a.k.a. Life as I know it...Part 2

2011-01-30T12:14:00.000+08:00

Thursday night, we were having a "meeting" of sorts, about who will be the on-duty officer on Friday. The thing is that Friday is Officemate's #1's rest day (and she and my bosses were going to a conference for which I was also devoid of, because of certain and unavoidable circumstances) and Officemate #2 has a thing he can't miss for an outside training. That leaves the office (and the world) to me.

If I look back, I was in the same situation just days before (Please see previous post). The only difference is that Officemate #2 came in the nick of time to save me from having the worst migraine of my life. It was all deja vu that I said without thinking, "Kayo, nakaka-dalawa na kayo sa akin ngayong week." Which is true.

It wasn't all bad news. My boss knelt, implored, and begged Officemate #1 to save me from the misery and at least help me for an hour after their SBETP conference in Rembrandt (Ok, I was exaggerating on the kneeling and begging part). Tomas Morato, after all, is just walking distance. On Saturday, I'll be at the office for the first half of the day (The other half will be dedicated to shuttling from QC to Manila, back to QC then back to Manila again with reference to an unending medical confirmation as a result of a full disclosure.). That will make up my time.

And so it was written. I am the on-duty Analyst for a 12 hour shift (10am-10pm) on a Friday.

***

Friday shift went without a glitch, so to speak. I was all fortunate nothing major is happening although I was a little concerned of walking alone in the dead of the night (Blumentritt, Espana, and Mother Ignacia aren't exactly my best friends). Pero maswerte pa din talaga ako. Nothing bad happened. Whew.

Saturday shift was uneventful but come afternoon, it was all stress. Ganito kasi yun. For the past five months, I've had three x-rays. The first was last August and the last two were taken last week and were just three days apart (If that's not radiation overdose, then I don't know what is!). I had to redo my chest x-ray on apicolordotic view kasi the doctors saw something "suspicious" on my right lung. That made my medical process more complicated, and to say the least, delayed. I need to pass the medical clearance from my clinic before the month ends so I can pass my fit to work clearance (i.e. DUH green paper) to the HR. That was why I was shuttling from QC to Manila and vice versa.

When I got the clearance from my doctor, I went back to the office Saturday afternoon to get the green paper from the ABS clinic. Ang bonggang sagot ng nurse ay hanggang 2pm lang ang duty na doctor na pipirma sa clearance ko. It was 3PM already. But what the hell am I supposed to do? My pulmonologist isn't in until 1pm then I was stuck in Quezon Avenue traffic dahil may naaksidente. The whole universe was conniving so I can't finish within the day! It really broke my heart because all the effort I did to make the thing work was all put to waste (I put my lunch on hold to make it on time. I ate "lunch" at 1530H. Snack na sya). Had I known, I didn't go back to QC when I was in Manila na, e di sana mas maaga pa kong nasa Mapua to join the festivities. In the end, I knelt, implored and begged the HR (na pumasok ng Saturday para hintayin ang clearance ko) na sa Monday ko na lang bibigay sa kanila ang DUH green paper. Hay, so stressful. :(

I met my alumni Builder friends at school, who were gracious enough to wait for me until close to 5PM. No fireworks this year. Kakadisappoint nga. FOMI backed out at the last minute as the sponsor when all the students were looking forward to it. What's Foundation day without the fireworks at the closing ceremonies? That is indeed a first. When we realized there's nothing much to do, I gatecrashed the Alumni night. Well, technically, I was "covering" the event. I was with the immediate past and present EIC after all! XD

Life as I know it

2011-01-25T22:58:00.000+08:00

Today is a day like no other.

I received two text messages last night. A colleague said he won't be coming to work until 6pm. The other message said that the other colleague will be at work after lunch. That leaves the office to me. Mine and only mine.

Now, now. There won't be any problem if the day is like any other weekend. Pero Tuesday kasi ngayon. SOBRANG madaming trabaho. Huhuhu. Gusto kong awardan ang sarili ko. Napanood ko ng tig-tatlong beses ang Noah at Mara Clara na airing kahapon, at ang Juanita Banana at Sabel na airing kanina. Tuloy-tuloy yun, mula 9.30AM hanggang past 6PM. Di na nakapasok si Karen kasi nagkaproblem sa NBI clearance nya. Akala ko aakuin ko na pati ang till 10pm shift. Akala ko din ako pa ang mag-aanalyze ng Mara Clara na for airing kanina. Akala ko talaga. Buti na lang hindi. Buti na lang talaga dumating si Kaw. Kungdi, luluwa na lang ang contacts ko at ako'y luluha nang bonggang-bongga.

Nakakahilo, sakit sa mata. Kakangarag. Tas may problema pa sa chuva kong medical. The hell. :(

Dear Sir,

2011-01-16T23:53:00.000+08:00

This is harder than I thought.

I originally thought of getting you something. Just something. Sadly, it didn't materialize. Wala po akong maisip na tingin ko ay wala pa kayo. Ganun ata talaga kapag rich ang reregaluhan. Napakahirap isipan ng regalo. So I'm writing here instead. This is an open letter, from me to you, and the rest of the world. :))

That day in the old NEO room when you asked me if I was an editor for my school paper before all of my batchmates, I initially wanted to say no (Di po kasi ako yung tipong pinagsasabi na writer ako. Ang korni kasi pag nalaman ng iba). But when you said, "Editor ka, di ba? Tiningnan ko na ang resume mo," that's when I decided to nod and say yes, because I stand no chance over denying what I have in my resume.

Then there was that day, in the then Equipment office (the one near the Firing Furnace), when you asked me if want to join the Blue Chronicle. Ang totoo, dun pa lang sa "Gusto mo sumali..." sasagot na ko e. But syempre, I want to be polite. Manager kaya kita. When you were finished, hindi rin ako nakapagsalita but I nodded repeatedly naman. Talk about excitement. Hahahaha...

And I won't forget those two days, especially when you offered me to be a part of your writing team. That at least I can find something good, something that I love doing despite the stress all those external factors were giving me. And I have you thank for it. For giving me that chance to be part of something special. Kahit dalawang issues lang, masaya na talaga ako :) (In fact, the articles that I wrote for BC were the most decent that I've written since college).

I left for a bunch of reasons. One thing was certain though. I didn't leave so soon because I had you as my manager. Inspite of everything, thank you for still keeping in touch. I'll gladly return the favor each time, and more importantly this coming March (San ba tayo Sir? :P).

I know that you won't believe some of what I've written but I want you to know that I'm naturally blunt. Born blunt. That's why they made me News Editor. Hehehe...

Happy birthday Sir Dyoks!

Hullabaloo moments (circa whenever)

2011-01-06T21:41:00.002+08:00

2007. Kakatapos lang ng exam sa Comm 1. Our professor required us to be in business attire or else wala kaming exam. After our class, one of my batchmates sa TNB called me to say that we have to cover the contract signing ng bagong coach ng Cardinals sa President's office ng Main Building. Meaning kelangan interview-hin, picturan and all and bagay daw ako since naka-japorms naman ako for the day. Ang pinaka-nakakalukey na moment is that magsisimula na ang event in any moment at nasa 4th floor pa kami ng Northwest building. Wla namang connecting bridge from the North or the West Buildings to the Main. You have to go down to the lobby, pass by the gym then climb up the stairs going to the President's office.

So imagine nyo na lang ang lola nyo, naka-three inch heels and pencil skirt, running along the corridors of my school for dear life. Actually, di lang ako ang tumatakbo. Yung dalawang kasama ko, sobrang nauuna na sa akin. When we were at the gym, I had it. I took off my shoes and ran barefoot, across the gym and into the first step of the first set of stairs, until we realized na hindi nga pala dun ang papuntang President's office and we had to use the other set on the other side. Then we crossed the Main Building lobby (kahit people were looking at us already, kasi no choice na. Maybe they were thinking, "Sino ba 'tong mga mayayabang na ginugulo ang lines ng Registrar at Treasury? Padala-dala pa ng camera ha. Humpf!"), climbed the stairs until we got to the door leading to the President's office. I wore back my heels, catched my breath, Kuya Guard watching in astonishment (Nag-Hi naman ako sa kanya e. LOL). After the event, my colleagues gave me a high five. How's that for dedication? :P

For the record, di ko din alam how I managed to get down from the 4th floor at full speed while on my heels. I guess it was the adrenaline? The very consolation I got was the Main Building lobby was shining clean. Neat!

2008. I was with Jun and Ben and papunta kaming Raon from Intramuros. We were at the Southbound lane ng Lawton, tatawid to the Northbound para papuntang Quiapo ang masakyan namin. Nagmamagaling kasi ako, tawid lang, sige go lang. The next thing I knew, Ben was pulling me from the road and a jeepney was blowing its horn at deafening levels. It turns out, muntik na ko ma-run over, thanks to my ingenuity and very, very stupid motor skills. Buti na lang andun ang mga super friends ko.

2010. Pero winner pa din ang moment when I came home from work and met Tita Daisy, our neighbor/family friend by our gate (Our houses are literally four steps away from each other). Chika chika lang kami, catching up, ganun. Until our conversation led to my chuvang lovelife. Then, out of the blue, she said, "Sana magkatuluyan kayo ni Mac." Mac is her son. Oh my good Lord, that could probably be the most awkward, flattering (maybe), I-want-to-melt-in-embarassment moment of my life. Ni hindi ko alam ang dapat isagot kay Tita. Should I say something witty, funny, or maki-ride on na lang? Pero dahil na rin sa awkwardness ng moment, ang malupit kong reply ay, "Hahahaha..."

2010 ulit. It was Sunday morning at ayoko pa bumangon nang maaga. But Mom was insisting I wake up and she was trying to make a conversation to a still-sleepy-me. Then bigla na lang nyang tinanong, "Gusto mo na mag-boyfriend?" MAYGAAAAD! WTF. I pretended not to hear and went on to sleep more. :))

010111

2011-01-01T01:26:00.002+08:00

Nakakatuwa talaga ang mga binary combination ng dates. Assuming that 010111 is base two, when converted to base 10, the decimal equivalent is 23 (Which is my birthdate. Cool!)

Heniweeeyyy...

Matagal na talaga akong nag-iisip ng matinong isusulat. Pero kadalasan, bigo ako. The last decent article I wrote was the cover story for my former company's newsletter. It feels like ages since I last wrote like that. And it feels that way too, when I was conceptualizing and writing the article proper. Two weeks ata (if I remember right) before the article completion (one week conceptualizing, another for writing). Pero somehow, no matter how I look at it, there are times that what I wrote still doesn't feel like the way I wanted it to be. Alam mo yun. Ganun pero di dapat ganun. Magulo. Ahahaha.

So how was media noche? Didn't have any. I was running late for dinner at home, because I was stuck at long queue of the wine section at the department store. It took a while before it was my turn. Then naghanap ako ng cork screw (na di ko din ginamit kasi nung buksan ko ang wine, e di naman pala cork ang seal nya. Bummer talaga. Ang tagal-tagal ko hinanap ang cork screw na yun sa Kitchenware.) and wine glass (na kinailangan ko pa maghanap ng mag-aassist kasi busy-busyhan ang mga tao sa SM. ). When I was in the counter na, ayaw pa tanggapin ang debit card ko. Nagloloko pa ang machine. Haynako, wala pa naman akong cash, e magsasara na ang counter kasi till 7pm lang sila. It was 6.55pm already, I was in the third floor and my ATM was in the ground floor! What I did was to grab the wine, the glasses and the cork screw, ran as fast as I could without screwing up the glasses, and prayed that no one is in line in PSBank or Chinabank's ATM machines (dahil kung meron, yari ako) so heaven can save me. Fortunately, no one is in line sa PSBank. I made the transaction real fast, then went to the nearest counter whose sales lady was more than happy to serve me.

Bakit kelangan bumili ng wine glass na kapartner ng white wine? Feelingera ako e, bakit ba? LOL. Now, I'm too tired to write. Galing pa kong work kanina, at nakipag-party din night of Dec. 30. Good night. Huhuhu :)

Last for 2011

2010-12-31T23:30:00.003+08:00

It's been a great year. Lots of memories never to be forgotten. To all who made my 2010 fun, exciting, or even hell, here's for another year of many great things to come.

Cheers!

Post Mortem

2010-12-26T18:59:00.002+08:00

2010 was marked by many, many failures. Failure to meet the goals set in 2009.

1. To save PHP 100k one year after I'm employed (by August 2010)
Hindi ko nagawa. The nearest I got was a little over 90%. And it was October na. Then I had to pay for something, and another something, and another something. Bills. Bills. Bills. Ugh.

2. Live a more active lifestyle.
Semi nagawa. Was able to join two fun runs. Planned to join DLSU's Greenovation, pero di natuloy dahil sa conflict ng sched, and the Adidas KOTR, di rin natuloy dahil nakalimutan ko na deadline na pala. Di pa ko nakaka-jogging sa Intra. Kahit dito sa neighborhood namin.

3. Recall musical background.
Mukhang malabo pa sa sabaw ng pusit (ika nga) ang goal na ito. Sa totoo lang, gusto ko na talagang order-in ang flute na nakita ko sa net. PHP 11k plus shipping from US. Then Emman was recommending the UP School of Music for lessons (I was thinking St. Scho since mas malapit.) Pero bigla akong pinaalalahanan ng isang kaibigan na asthmatic nga pala ako. Sayang, it was really my way to challenge my lungs so I can take care of myself more (Ano daw? Ironic!). I planned to swtich gears to piano, but again, conflict in work schedule prevents me from doing so. To this day, I haven't erased the bookmark of the online store where I found the flute, nor UP School of Music's page on my Chrome.

4. Gala.
And a lot I had. Sa mall. Yes yaya, I'm such a loser! Well, the farthest I got to was err...Laguna? Consider that an achievement. Back in college, my farthest was Noveleta, Cavite, and it was for a design project! My dream travel remains to be Vigan, and their mala-Intramuros streets feel with an authentic twist. Vigan or Corregidor. But I still choose Vigan. :P

5. Read more.
More books than magazines I mean. The problem is that newspapers and magazines are more accessible in my house than books are. Our shelves are overflowing (and counting) with books on Sociology, History and Philippine whatever-s that my sister have from her undergrad and post grad days. Not really a typical read or what a commoner would like to browse on a free day. For now, I thank the Lord for blessing my mother with enlightenment that The Philippine Star will not step foot in our house again. EVER. Buti naman, hmp! Welcome back, PDI.

The time may not be today but tomorrow, I swear, I'll start treading my way. One day, I'll get there. Mark my words. Don't take a rain check. You might as well miss me. :P

Gaga over Etheridge

2010-12-21T20:17:00.001+08:00

Early this morning, my sister switched channels to ANC. It was an unusual departure from the morning routine, kasi UKG ang pinapanood ko pag umaga. But nevermind, pareho namang ABS. So sabi sa commercials, Azkals will be guests at Mornings @ ANC this morning. When I found out, syempre, first impulse was to ask Ate for a picture. Feeling ko kasi di ako aabot sa taping ng Mornings (which is 9AM. Dumarating ako sa office ng past 9am na.). Pero nung dumaan ako sa news room para maghatid ng lunch ni Ate, sabi nila, di pa dumarating ang team. E di may hope pa. At syempre, kinapalan ko na din ang mukha ko. Sumama ako sa picturan galore ng ANC people. Wahahaha. We were actually with Ms. Karen Davila who also wanted to meet the team (I was astonished by how approachable the lady was, which is in deep contrast to her stern personality on TV.). Girls on the news room (including me) were marching their way, first to Studio 7. Pero wala pa sila dun so we were waiting by the dressing room. Then there was info that they were at the Loop or Starbucks. E di mega lakad kami to Starbucks. Until we got a reliable info that they're in Studio 6 already, which is the studio of Mornings @ ANC.

The scene at the dressing room was different altogether. We were like high school students gushing over the campus hearthrob, bringing out cameras and taking pictures. Ate was documenting the whole event, i.e. video recording everything from the start. And I must say: Goodness, parang Poon ang kaharap namin. Ang tangkad, ang wafu, so English! Jusko. Di ko na pinalagpas ang pagkakataon. I had my picture taken with Neil Etheridge, which is so high in resolution, it doesn't even fit my desktop! XD

Eto ang patunay. Eat your heart out. :P

No essence at all

2010-12-20T00:20:00.005+08:00

Five days na lang, Pasko na. Pero ewan, di ko talaga maramdaman ang essence. Na-set kasi ang utak ko na may pasok ako sa Pasko at New Year. So mga two months na yun, conditioned na, tinanggap ko na papasok ako sa holidays. Pero nung Friday lang na-confirm na shutdown ang isang portion ng operation for the holiday season, meaning walang material na darating sa amin, so shutdown din kami. I'm both happy and sad. Happy syempre, sino ba ang may gusto pumasok ng holidays di ba? (Men, Pasko at Bagong taon, kasama mo ang mga papel at paper clip ng opisina? Party, party mag-isa? Que horror!)Sad, kasi alam kong tatambak ang trabaho dahil sa shutdown. Deliverables for this year na matapos ang award winning naming database and file analysis. Nakatambak na ang for analysis dahil priority lagi ang mga for airing and di naman 24/7 ang operations. So mega back log ang drama ng department. Di ko na din alam kung panong gagawin para matapos lahat. Ang naiisip ko lang na solution--straight duty. Ang tanong ay sino ang magduduty, kelan at paano mag-swak sa sched naming tatlo.

***

For this year, tinatamad akong umuwi ng probinsya. Kasi tinataguan ko ang mga pinsan na di ko nabilhan ng regalo. TNT ako for now. I shall see you after the holiday season my dear cousins. Next year will be better! (Eto rin ang sabi ko last year. Wahaha) And, I need to make up sa time, since ako lang ang affected sa working hours dahil sa holidays. Iniisip ko pa if papasok ba ko ng Sunday, or mega OT for two weeks to complete my time. Di pa sure, pero parang mas favorable ang Sunday sched since isang araw lang papasok, 8 hours agad ang na-complete ko. Bahala na. Let's see na lang.

***

There are talks. And talks they still are. Sana magkatotoo. Well, sana talaga. Fingers crossed. Rank and file, rank and file, rank and...ah whatever.

Four is how you give it away

2010-12-13T19:08:00.003+08:00

My dreaded day has come. And when I was in front of the ATM machine, I couldn't bring myself to do it twice.

Enter pin number > Withdraw > Enter amount > Press a number > Press the corresponding zeroes > Get card > money > receipt

Oh, my good Lord. I never imagined that I'd be walking along the gut-wrenching streets of Divisoria and Recto clad in shirt, shorts and sunglasses, striding furiously without hints of hesitation, while carrying a few grand on my bag.

But honestly though, it was the pressing the zeroes that dreaded me the most. I was like, "Let's get over this." Then I had to do it all over again because I reached the maximum allowable cash for withdrawal at a time. Now that I said it, you can just imagine how much I'm talking about.

I officially hate two and four from now on. Oh, and three as well.

The extra mile

2010-12-05T02:40:00.000+08:00

There are a lot of things that I learned from my previous company that I can't simply let go. They helped shape who I am and I'm very thankful for that. But prior to that, I feel utmost gratitude to my former colleagues and friends in the school paper. It is only now that I realize how big a role it played to my development as an individual and as a professional.

Of all the things I learned from the paper, it is the people skills that come handy. I talk to people from all walks of life--from the campus security guards to the subject chairs, deans, student leaders, fellow students. I shake hands with the school's Chief Financial Officer, VP for Student Affairs, EVP for Academic Affairs, VP for Legal Affairs, Alumni Liason, and even the President himself. To cut the story, I know how to talk to people, strike a conversation, and build a network that will be advantageous for my organization.

It is a double edged sword, actually. One that takes you to the darkness. There are times that I ask myself when I became part of it. Or when I intend to get away. So much for the laws of power.

***

My supervisor will be in Singapore to attend a seminar (about well, something you don't want to know) and she won't be back until Wednesday. Until then, she said I am the OIC. Now, is it a good thing or bad thing? I honestly don't know. As of the moment, the very thing I am praying for and most concerned about is that the whole universe won't conspire to do anything crazy till my boss gets back. Because if something happens, I'm in charge. On call lagi. Medyo nalulungkot lang ako because I have to go to the office this coming Monday, when it's my rest day. :( Half day lang ako siguro. I'll follow up some things, call the concerned people, send email, and I'm off! Sadly, di ko na ata matuturuan ang OJT namin. Not on Monday. By Wednesday, I have to make him a master analyst of on-air channel 2 monitoring. Kakayanin ba?

I'm barely four months on this job and it seems the responsibilities are getting more and more weighted on our end. Nakakainis pa, parang unti-unti kong nakakalimutan ko ang basics, ang mga standards, because I'm too focused on doing another thing. 24 hours and an account without internet connection are not enough to master this thing before March.

***

It's past 2AM and close to 3AM as I'm writing this. Grabe, di na naman ako makatulog. :(

Pseudo poet

2010-11-28T15:29:00.002+08:00

Re-living my high school days when I used to write poems and poems alone. Inspired by a friend. Here goes nothing.

*********

Sweet retaliation

The moonlight reminds
of the lingering nights,
of memories trapped,
of moments of your outstretched hand--
reaching, clasping, holding
that empty space between the clouds.
And you lie on your back,
gazing at the stars
swiftly, softly, gently.
Never to let a second pass.

The moonlight reminds
of those passive delights,
of silent memories,
of moments of my outstretched hand--
reaching, clasping, holding
and still feeling empty inside.
And I lie on my back,
gazing at the stars--
cold, fallen, indifferent--
and to the memory that never was.

The price

2010-11-22T01:21:00.001+08:00

Solo. Yan ang eksena ko sa office tuwing Sabado. Ako lang ang tao sa buong opisina, at sa buong Technical Operations Division. Masaya ba? Oo at hindi. Let me count the ways.

Masaya kasi...

1. Pwede akong mag-early or late lunch, kahit gaano katagal. Pero dahil alam kong matatambakan ako ng trabaho, syempre di rin ako nag-o-overbreak. In fact, pwede din ako mag-early out and no one will know. But as a friend said, "Do the right thing even when no one's around." Character is who you are when nobody sees you, ika nga.

2. Pwede akong kumain sa labas. As in sa labas ng company. Counted pa rin naman ang mga kainan sa harap ng ELJ Building sa Mother Ignacia. :))

3. After my Saturday duty comes my rest days, Sunday and Monday. Mondays are very, very favorable to me. Kasi dun ko nagagawa ung mga "official" na dapat gawin (i.e. going to the bank, paying the bills, ayusin ang mga papeles ng kung anumang churva...Oh you get the idea.). Sundays naman, yun ang kalimitang schedule ng mga fun run. So kahit mapagod ako sa katatakbo, I still have the next day para magpahinga. :)

Hindi masaya kasi...

1. Every time na lalabas ako, kelangan kong i-lock ang pinto. Kahit pag punta akong CR, kukuha ng tubig, or punta sa pantry. Lahat ng mga nabanggit ay literally a stone's throw away sa pinto ng office, pero dahil praning ako at ayokong mawala ang mga kagamitan pagbalik ko, ayun, lock ko na lang para safe.

2. Tuwing sasapit na ang hapon, mga 4PM, movie showing lagi sa Channel 2. For two weeks in a row, horror ang movie. E mag-isa nga lang ako sa buong kamunduhan ng engineering at nagre-reverberate ang audio sa buong opisina (at di talaga ako friendly sa horror movies. The Ring nga di ko pinanood ever.), ang creepy talaga sa feeling. Iniiwan ko na nga bukas ang pinto para di ako magulat if sakaling may papasok. Juice mio. Tapos may usap-usapan pa na may mumu daw sa office. Ay nako, lalo akong na-praning.

3. Well, mag-isa ako. There's nobody's to share the brunt of the job. It was especially hard during the first week. But I've gotten used to it. My only problem is the horror movies. :))

4. I can't pull an all nighter, even during Friday nights, when most of my friends are scheduling their after work activities. Even during Sundays, when most of them are online, di ko rin sila machat nang matagal kasi nga may pasok sila kinabukasan. Kapag Monday naman, well, sino ba ang ineexpect ko na mag-OL pag Monday morning right? It is my utmost dilemma, and the price I have to pay for (insert-the-gasgas-line-here, deep breath, and in 300wpm...)choosingBroadcastingasacareerpath (exhales). So ginagawan ko talaga ng paraan to make time for my friends. I can't let my schedule get in the way. Bwahahahaha...

Wala naman talagang normal na schedule ang field na pinili ko. Kahit san anggulo tingnan. Sabi nga ni Armand, "A career is what defines you...It's basically who you are." If this is what truly defines me and the dilemma is part of it, then might as well accept the consequences that go with it. That's a small price to pay to living a fulfilled life. Cheers!

The better runner

2010-11-14T09:55:00.003+08:00

Okay, one of my goals as of the moment is to be an active runner. Kakatuwa tumakbo e. So in line with this (may ganun talaga, parang news article lang. LOL), I registered for the NBI Run Against Crime. The run was held today, at the Quirino Grandstand. Syempre, 5K pa din ako but this time, I have a running buddy--my twin sister.

Late na kami dumating sa Grandstand. Ang bagal kasi ng jeep na nasakyan namin to Divisoria. Di na nga ako masyado nakapag-warm up. Kung meron man, yun ay ang pagtakbo namin sa field papuntang venue, kasi naririnig namin na magsisimula na, and we're about 200 meters away pa!

Come gunstart, takbo na. But fot the whole run, my sister outwitted, outplayed and outlasted me. Oh, if you could only see her face when she looks back to check on me. Kulang na lang sabihin, "Ang bagal mo." Di ko naman sya masisi. E ang bagal ko nga. Compared to her, a regular runner, e ano ba ang binatbat ng beauty ko? My last was the Pasig River fun run, which is a month ago pa.

The opportunity came para maasar ko sya. Mid-run along Roxas Boulevard, I saw this sign that says, "Slow down." Then I shouted for the whole of Luneta to hear, "Don't you see the sign? It says slow down!" She replied with her signature dry wit, "It's meant for cars, you know." I retorted back, "Oh, it's meant for anyone who reads it." Ah, defeat. I can never win against a high school teacher. :(

My timecode when I crossed the finish. That's plus the time na tumengga kami sa may Grandstand kasi akala namin tapos na (mga five minutes yun). Pero may isang ikot pa pala sa may Manila Hotel before you can call yourself a finisher. Oh, look, I improved my time. :)

Lady luck is not on my side today

2010-11-12T21:38:00.005+08:00

This was quite a day. Now, let me start at the very beginning.

Last night, after what seemed like a long day in the office, I went home mga 8PM. Syempre, I always follow the pattern--out ng office, walk my way to Quezon Avenue then get a ride to Blumentritt. It was past 8PM na din, kasi napatagal ang paglalakad namin dahil kumakain kami ng junk food. Ayoko na kasing maghintay ng jeep kaya nung may dumating na FX, pinatos ko na. Nung mid-ride na, syempre magbabayad na ko. Dun ko na-realize that I left my wallet in the office. It was a good thing that I have some spare cash in my pocket (one thing I don't do in any given day dahil lagi akong nahuhulugan ng cash) enough to get me home, and a cellphone with some hefty prepaid credits to call anyone at any given time (For everyone who knows me, it is common knowledge na di ako madalas mag-load. Kaya yung time na yun na may pang-tawag ako, minsan lang talaga.). I called the office the moment I was at Espana, asked them to keep my thing to the drawer that leads to the deepest core of the earth, then off I went home.

So the next day is a different story all together. Naglalakad ako sa Blumentritt going to the Espana terminal like any other morning. Nung nasa jeep na ko, dun ko na napansin that my bag's front pocket was wide wide open. And I can't find my purse. Damn.

Since I only have that spare cash that was in my purse that was stolen from me(dahil ayoko paalam sa bahay na naiwan ko ang wallet ko sa office, di ako naningil ng utang), walang-wala akong peraness. My first impulse was to go to Melanie's school (malapit lang kasi...mga 1km away) but I would need a ride to get there. If I walked, I don't have a guarantee that she'll be available for me . She has classes, you see. And it's a no cellphone policy in the classrooms, even for the faculty. Or even if I went and actually talked to her, I won't make it in time to get to Quezon City. It was a good thing that I have a cellphone with loads and loads of prepaid credits (Thanks again, my dear company), I was able to make "kikil" to Mommy para makapuntang opis.

First time ko 'to. Kahit nga mga mandurukot sa Divisoria, di ako ginalaw sa inaraw-araw na ginawa ni Lord na dumadaan ako dun nung estudyante pa lang ako. Ewan ko ba. Blumentritt is on my blacklist. Lesson learned? Laging mag-load. Malayo ang mararating nito. :P

I have a crazy idea. Who's with me?

2010-11-08T20:11:00.004+08:00

I was lazily checking some sites in the internet last night, until I came upon an interesting link about a fun run sponsored by the NBI. Cut the chase. I registered today before lunch. It was dirt cheap (compared to the other fun runs) for 150 PHP without the singlet, and 250 PHP with a singlet. I tried inviting Lhudie pero di nya trip ang takbo-takbo. Sad. Pero anyway, my twin sister is running with me too! Hehe.

The NBI run is very, very favorable for me. For one, malapit lang ang tatakbuhan (Sa Quirino Grandstand ang start line), and 6AM ang call time. Yung iba kasing takbo, sa Ortigas, Taguig, or sa Fort Bonifacio. Naman, men, kamon. Para sa katulad kong mahirap lamang, di ko mapupuntahan yun if wala akong sasakyan. As usual, 5K pa din ang distance ko. Boring kasi ang 3K and wala namang 10K.

Habang papauwi ako from NBI office, this weird thought dawned on me. Why not run the whole stretch of LRT Line 1 from Monumento to Baclaran? That covers 17.2 km, or almost four times ng actual na tinatakbo ko. Whoa. It is only now that I researched the total distance that I realize the gravity of that idea. Ewan, naisip ko lang talaga. XD If ever I'd really pursue this, I want to be prepared for it. I mean, tamang conditioning and all. At dapat, mabilis na kong tumakbo. And isa pa, gagawin ko ito pag regular na ko at pwede nang mag-VL sa work, so I'll have ample time to recuperate from whatever kapaguran (or God forbid, injuries)ang mapupulot ko.

Ang baliw ko talaga. Makapag-invite din kaya ng isa pang baliw sa ideang ito. Harharharhar.

Trade off

2010-11-04T22:58:00.002+08:00

It wasn't until one Tuesday night, after my shift, when I first saw this huge tarpaulin in front of the Esguerra gate, that I was able to contemplate. The tarp unveils the hidden realities in Mother Ignacia. I won't go into details. After all, "The internet is written in ink."

***

The reality is this: kailangan ng pera para mabuhay. Another hardcore reality: walang pera sa broadcasting. Technically, that makes me broke. Well, not actually broke broke. But if I think, like five years from now, I don't see myself driving my own car in this industry. That's how it sucks. :(

Flashback, one year ago. My daily scenario is still fresh in my mind, and I blogged a whole lot about it. I worked my way for a year and all I ever got in return were bigger eye bags and a dwindling body weight. I felt as wealthy as Mark Zuckerburg but I never had the time to burn the extra cash. If it's choice between getting rich and getting a life, heeellllooooowww. Dun ako sa get a life, anuber.

***

There are a lot of things that I miss about Samsung. Too many, I can't write them all. In fact, most of the time, I ask myself if leaving was the best thing to do. But I look back and realize that I traded a more "prosperous" life just so I can do the things I want and those I like to do.

Life is too short to not do the things I want! So, I'll wear a mini skirt, boots and a girly top to the office come one of the winter-y days of December (Teka, kelangan pang maghanap ng boots), jog along the Walls of Intramuros one cool morning (Sa walls talaga, hindi sa loob ng Intra), read all I can about Audio metering standards, write for PDI or finish one screenplay (matinong pangarap na di ko alam kung maabot ko) and, if the world permits, revisit my sheet music.

Now, that makes the Before I Die list more colorful. :))

The movies I watch are boring

2010-10-29T20:50:00.010+08:00

It's been a while since the last time I went to the movies. The last I watched was Here Comes the Bride (2010, dahil nahila ako ng isang kaibigan). Before that was Quantum of Solace (2008 sa Greenbelt, libre nung birthday ni Armand), then National Treasure 2 (2007, treat of Accenture for a leadership conference), V for Vendetta (2006, my choice), Corpse Bride (2005, birthday treat ni Patrick), Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Harry Potter and the Chamber of secrets (2005 and 2002 respectively, Potter fan ako). If you look at the pattern closely, the movies that I preferred to watch (V and the Potter films) are super boring. Di kasi ako nanonood ng mga love stories, action flicks, horror (naman, lagi ko iniiwasan ito), or comedy. Gusto ko kasi yung may sense. Hindi yung tatawa lang ako, iiyak lang ako, or matatakot ako.

Mabibilang lang talaga sa dalawang kamay ang films na pinanood ko, sa sinehan I mean. Hindi ko alam, pero di ko talaga naging hobby yun. Madalas kasi hinihintay ko na lang sa free TV (before we had HBO), or sa panahon ngayon, hinihintay ko sa Torrent. Natural lang talaga na kuripot ako, di ko ginagastusan ang mga chuvang lakad to the theater. Unless gusto ko talaga ang story ng film, nahila ako ng mga kaibigan, o kaya birthday treat (o kung may manlilibre ng popcorn), wapakels na ko sa ibang chorva ng sinehan.

***
Pero, something caught my attention, Aaron Sorkin's The Social Network. The movie is about the founder of my much adored site, Facebook. My bias to the film with Facebook as its basis is only secondary. What caught my eyes was that Sorkin wrote the screenplay. That one hell of a genius who wrote the best politics-based show ever, The West Wing. I admire the man most of all. No, in fact, I worship him and his script writing skills. I love WW to the depth, and breath and height, so much that I have the all the the seven season's worth of DVD. Now, back to the movie...

Actually, medyo matagal ko nang alam that there will be a movie about Facebook and Sorkin will write the script. Apparently, that project was the main reason Sorkin signed for a Facebook account (I think this is the period when FB was gaining momentum over Friendster globally). I remember Melanie told me about that two years (or less) back so I wasn't that surprised when they told the world about the movie's premiere.

I want to watch The Social Network. Not because it's all hyped up in the internet. Pero dahil gusto kong mapanood ang story and get those witty, rapid fire dialogues the screenplay's writer was well-known for all over again. Maybe tomorrow, after more than five month's hiatus, I'll reunite with the theater again. Hey, it's the first time I'll be seeing two movies in a year. :)

***

Apart from The Social Network, on my list is Cesar Apolinario's Estasyon, an Indie film that centers on a boy's journey from Laguna to Quiapo to touch the image of the Black Nazarene during the traditional procession. The critics are praising Apolinario's movie, I thought why not watch it? The problem was I didn't know if it's still running or not (even with Google, I can't find the right keywords to get the damn date). Pwede na siguro DVD. Pero nako, di ko din alam if meron na bang DVD. Again, I thought, "Why not ask the director himself?" So I did. Harharhar...

Ok, update lang. Estasyon was shown 2009 pa. :( Anyway, masaya na ko na meron na palang DVD ang Banal dahil nasa "imaginary" list ko din yun ng Movies to Watch before I Die. Twas so sweet of Sir Cesar Apolinario (Sir talaga, feeling close ako. Wahaha) to reply. Pero bittersweet e. Sayang talaga wala pa ang Estasyon in DVD. Or kung magkakaroon pa ba ng DVD copy...sana. Pwede bang replay na lang sa TV??? Huhuhu...Sige na Lord, puuuhhhhliiizzz?

Random shutdown

2010-10-24T01:25:00.003+08:00

Ayon sa aking pamilya, walang tatalo sa oras ng pagtulog ko. Ako kasi ang tipong late at mahaba matulog, tanghaling nagigising. Lagi akong napagsasabihan dati na dapat magising ako nang mas maaga para gumawa ng mga tasks sa bahay. Pero dati yun. Ngayon di na nila masasabi yan. Papaalala ko lang na kinaya ko gumising ng 4AM (or earlier) every working day for one year nung nasa Laguna pa ang office ko. And all I did was to set the alarm at maximum volume. No other human intervention.

Maraming drawbacks ang paggising nang maaga. Una, laging inaantok (At sa katulad kong di nagkakape sa umaga, super major setback 'yan). Pangalawa, laging wala sa sarili (Minsan, nagha-hang na lang ako bigla, mabagal ang processing ng brain, at laging nakakalimot ng mga bagay-bagay). Pangatlo, (at bukod pa sa laging inaantok) random shutdown ng katawan. As in may mga moment na di ko namamalayan, natutulog na pala ako. Hidden skill ko daw since college. Kung bakit may "daw," e dahil ayon 'yan sa mga super friends ko. Eto kasi ang kwento ng mga kaibigan ko...

May class kami sa Advanced Mathematics na 12-1.30PM ang schedule. I was seated at the second row, farthest left from the teacher's table so it is understandable na wala na kong makita sa mga writings sa other side ng white board. Dahil wala na kong mapagtuunan ng pansin, tumingin na lang ako sa notebook ko tapos hawak ko lang ang G-tech ko. Tapos, nagtatanong si Zorel sa amin kasi meron syang di magets. One by one tinanong nya daw kami. Nung ako na, hindi daw ako sumasagot. Syempre gulat si friend di ako nagsasalita. Sabi na lang daw ni Rachell, "Mulat pero ang totoo tulog 'yan.Talent nya 'yan." Ewan, siguro tulog nga ako kasi di ko naaalala eto. XD

Marami talagang instances na nagra-random shutdown ako. Lalo na kapag nakakaantok ang speaker. Notorious akong sleeper sa Communications 5 lecture ni Lolo Cards. Walang meeting na di ako natulog. Ang malupit pa dun, malapit ako sa harap nakaupo, direct line of sight sa prof table. Napagod na rin ang mga katabi ko sa araw-araw na paggising sa ken. Sa work, mas marami akong bonding moments with REM. Siguro nga, innate talent ko na din ang pumwesto such that hindi halata na tulog ako. One incident was memorable though. I remember a morning when my Supervisor caught me in the act of sleeping in the office (As in nakapikit ako and it was only 9AM!). He had to snap his fingers to wake me up. Hahaha...

Siguro nga, sinagad ko ang katawan ko nung kolehiyo. At hanggang ngayon, inaabuso ko pa din. Puyat nang puyat nang puyat...Nahihirapan talaga akong baguhin ang lifestyle ko na dapat maaga natutulog. At dobleng hirap din dahil gusto ko mag-jogging sa umaga, di ko naman magawa, kasi nga late na ko nagigising :(Katulad na lang ngayon, umaga na pero gising pa din ako. So mag-jogging ako now na? LOL.

It all boils down to one thing though. If there's a will, there's a way. Sabi nga ni Dick Gordon, lahat ng bagay ay kaya ng gobyerno, kung meron lang political will to do things. Kung gusto ko talaga matulog nang maaga, e di wag na manood ng Criminal Minds sa Fox Channel. Torrent na lang (As if kaya kong gawin 'to...). Hay. I have to think of other ways to change my body clock without sacrificing my favorite show.

Duets sound better

2010-10-17T01:53:00.006+08:00

I have a thing for duets. In a good way I mean. To me, two people singing together is more dynamic and exciting. There are a lot of rooms to do voicing and partner interaction that a solo performance can't offer. And it's not only in singing. Tango would be very, very dry sans the partner; Coke will just fizzle and taste flat without the ice; there can't be any hope without despair...See, the list of duos in this world is endless! The irony is that while any two people (or matter, organism, or thing) contradict in characteristics, still, one cannot exist without the other.

***

2006. I remember it was a school day for most colleges, but Mapua was on break at the time (E quarterm kami, anong gagawin?) . Melanie and I were to watch Anatomiya ng Korapsyon after her class so I was hanging out at UST. I was sitting across the building of the Faculty of Arts and Letters and while waiting for time to pass, I was reading a book. Some time later, a girl in AB uniform approached me.

(The memory of this incident is blurry. These may not be the exact lines but it's the thought that counts! XD)

Girl: Melai, bakit ikaw lang asan na 'yung iba?

Me: Ah, andun na sila sa loob.

Girl: Ay ganun? Teka, bakit di ka naka-uniform?

Me: Wala, trip lang. Nang-aasar ako (I was wearing a Mapua shirt).

(Awkward pause here)

Me: Sige, mauna ka na sa loob. Sunod ako.

Girl: Ok, sige!

Of course, I'm not surprised that she was Melanie's classmate. I'm used to people mistaking me for my twin sister. Long story short, I decided to keep my hair as long as possible (she's keeping hers as short as possible) so even strangers can tell the difference. It worked, maybe one-over-sixty-fourth of the time. I guess some people have a blind spot for my almost shoulder length hair. Harharhar...

Maraming nagtatanong if we switched places in school. Well, we PLANNED to switch, but it never materialized. The major conflict was our majors (I was into sciences, she was Bachelorrrrr en Arrrrrtes), and her lack of confidence in Math (this was a major, major problem because I was an engineering major). It's still one of the biggest mischiefs I plan to accomplish in life. You know, yung pag-aaralan lahat, pati mga pictures ng friends and classmates nya to create a Kagebunshin of my sister (although I'm a look alike already...but still...).

Life's more exciting and more colorful when you know you can fool some people by pretending to be somebody who looks exactly like you. Right? Dagdag pa na makulit ako at sinasakyan ko ang mga nagkakamali sa pagkatao ko. Hehehe...So to make out for lost time of almost no internet this week because they're monopolizing our router-less internet connection, I'll be watching Christian Bautista duets in Youtube till my eyes pop out of their socket tonight...er this morning pala. Ballads always sound best in duets. :D

Takbo!

2010-10-10T20:26:00.008+08:00

10.10.10. Let's run for Mother Nature. :D

As promised, I joined the Run for the Pasig River. Di ako nakasama sa cluster ng ABS kasi naman late na ko nagising at dumating ako sa starting line ng 4.45AM. E ang assembly is 4.30AM. More so di ko na sila nahanap. A sea of people greeted me the moment I was near the CCP compound. I was texting and calling my officemates pero male-late daw sila. Most of them are coming from Las Pinas area and because of the traffic (Yeah, ang aga ng traffic. Most roads were closed.) they too, are late for the company's assembly time. Naghanap na lang ako ng mga naka-ABS na jersey, then I blended with the crowd. Ang puwesto ko is a few meters away from the starting line, just across the stage. They have a really big screen projector na pinakita ang mga host ng 10K run, sina Manny Pacquiao at Piolo Pascual (When I saw their images sa screen, I really felt bad I wasn't in 10K. Oh, nevermind. I know I'll be wishing otherwise when the actual run starts.) One memorable Pacquiao moment was after he lead the pledge for saving the Pasig River. He actually announced in his thick Gensan accent, "Ridi naba kayuuuuuu?" And which he followed with, "Lits get ridi to rambbbooooollll!"

After FVR's gun start bandang 5.45AM, ayun na. Takbo, takbo, takbo. Nung umpisa tumatakbo talaga ako pero dahil sa dami ng runners at natakot akong makabangga ng tao, binagalan ko. I'll run, walk then run again, ganung cyle lang kasi syemlre napapagod din ako anerst. Hehehe... Pero kapag may chance na maluwag ang daan, ino-overtake ko na. It's nice to run alone kasi I can take my time and keep my own pace. Nung abot-tanaw ko na ang malaking globe ng MoA, sabi ko, malapit na, malapit na. Nung nasa Seaside na at nakikita ko na ang finish line, naglakad na lang ako. Cool down. At nung makita ko ang timecode, bongga gulat ko. Kaya ko palang tumakbo ng limang kilometro sa loob ng approximately 53 minutes. Not bad for a first time runner. :D

The iconic MoA globe

The finish line. My approximate timecode, taken seconds before I cross the finish line

Masarap tumakbo. Nakakaalis ng stress. Sa totoo lang, mas sumakit pa ang paa ko sa kakahanap kung nasan ang baggage claim area ng 5K. Hanlayolayolayolayolayolayo sa civilization! Tapos talagang nag-isip ako ng paraan kung pano uuwi (at magbreakfast) dahil wala pang masakyan because well, sarado pa ang mga daan. Buti na lang nakita ko ang college friend and former colleague kong si Ean sa finished line. Tumambay kami sa MoA till mga 9AM before kami naghiwalay. Mind you, ang pagsakay pauwi ay parang fun run pa din. Paunahan ang drama kasi konti pa lang ang dumadaan sa MoA na papuntang LRT Buendia.

Twas a fun, fun, fun Sunday today. Adidas is organizing another run this October. Now, sasali ba ko sa iba pang run? Hmm...Let's see muna. :)

Because I'm equally hard-headed as the Redwood

2010-10-04T13:53:00.009+08:00

Eight years back, while having a music lesson in school, my teacher asked me to play the Minuet 3. The piece by J.S. Bach is my second favorite (just after his other composition, Minuet 2) it is only natural I get excited while playing. Halfway through, my teacher interrupted me; I was off beat. She said the Minuet was a slow dance for the court and my playing just wouldn't fit the royals and aristocrats that will dance with it (The piece should be played in 3/4 time signature and my excitement caused me to play close to 2/4). Acknowledging my mistake, I played it again from the top. But somehow, along the way, I faltered again. I remember making the same mistake over and over until my teacher had enough she brought out a gadget that gives the player beat at periodic intervals (I have to listen to the thing to be on the right beat. Sorry, I really don't know how it's called.). But I'm one stubborn student. Before running out of patience, my teacher said that if I was an instrumentalist in the court where the kings and queens will dance on my playing, they would have stumbled all over because my Minuet varied in tempo. "Do not run. Madadapa sila," she reminded me.

***

The pressure to-be-this or to-be-that-before-you're-thirty is constantly there. That's one thing I can't escape. And I don't have to. I won't fall for the tediuos reason to be someone because this life is still my choice. Anyone can offer me all the opportunities, take me to numerous crossroads, but the path is still for my taking. How long it will take me to get to my goals is still my decision. Because as of the moment, I want to take things in stride. When things seem like a race to the finish, I refuse to get ahead of the pack. The reason is simple. I don't like to rush. I don't want to rush. Conforming with the fast paced life in the city is tantamount to suicide, to chasing a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, to a life of passive submission.

***

If I can meet my music teacher again, I'll thank her endlessly. Needless to say, she'll be disappointed I stopped playing my instrument but I can always retort back that I learned what I needed from her. I may not be anything close to an instrumentalist now, but I can proudly say that even without her gadget, I am on my time signature. Because I refuse to follow the norm. Because I take time to breathe and smell the flowers. Miss Janna, I'm not running. :)

Close encounter of the third kind

2010-10-03T18:44:00.005+08:00

I'm running at the Pasig Marathon on 10/10/10. Five kilometers ang tatakbuhin ko, which is from CCP compound to SM Mall of Asia. Sa mga nagtatanong if runner ako, naku hindi po ang sagot. Gusto ko lang ma-experience ang tumatakbo nang medyo matagal dahil di na nababanat ang muscles ko nang matindi-tindi since nung team building ko sa Samsung some months ago. I'm trying to live a sporty life (Or maybe I'm trying too hard. Wahaha...). Mahirap naman ang magkaron ng kung anu-anong sakit dahil di nag-eexercise.

Which lead me to the decision to buy a decent pair of running shoes. Since sale naman sa mga mall ngayong weekend, I grabbed the opportunity para sa mga mega discount. At di ako nabigo. I got 50% off for a pair of Fila. O di ba swerte ko? :D

After my trip to the mall, I went to the nearby church to hear mass. So far, smooth naman. Until someone sat beside me before the mass started. Akala ko ok lang kasi mukha naman syang ok. Pero wag ka, pagkalipas ng ilang moments, she was talking softly to no one in particular. Ang malaking catch pa dun ay di sya tumitigil. Bumubulong talaga.

Then I realized, the woman was level four schizophrenic! I was on my toes the whole time. Yun lang ata ang moment na talagang nagseryoso akong magdasal sa Panginoon na walang mangyari sa akin at sa buntis na katabi din nya. Oh my naman di ba, she could've done anything God only knows for the duration of the mass. She was muttering things, scoffing then laughing, then muttering again; as if she was talking to another being from her planet. The greatest irony was she looked like any normal person, dressed appropriately and all (Ok, she was wearing a high waist skirt and a hanging blouse. But still, that is normal, right?) which I suppose was the reason the church's security didn't stop her from getting in. Come homily, when the priest asked the people to greet each other, "May awa ang Diyos," I didn't do it. The hell naman! Pano pag binati ko sya at kausapin ako nang bongga tungkol sa mga super friends nya sa underworld? Hay. The lady was quite a character.

***

My right shoulder is giving up on me. Yes, again. The pain started last Monday pa and I assumed it will go away after a couple of days. Pero, again, I was wrong. The pain put my tolerance to the test for the whole week. Masakit talaga men. I didn't know where it was coming from because I'm using my left shoulder to carry my bag. The solution I came up with was to have a massage this late afternoon. And boy, my body was relieved, as if I can feel my shoulder breathing again. :) Twas nice to have a massage. Masarap kaya, try mo! XD

Ako ang bantay ng tindahan

2010-09-26T20:42:00.004+08:00

Tomorrow is another holiday for me. Dahil shifting na ang schedule namin, ang day off ko ay Sunday at Monday. Abnormal as it may seem, pero ok na din. Way better than be assigned in the 2PM to 10PM shift kahit Saturday and Sunday ang off. So I'll be at the office Tuesdays to Saturdays, 10AM to 6PM. Favorable ang schedule na yun sa tulad kong nocturnal at di makatulog nang maaga (I sleep at 12 midnight, and wake up at 6 in the morning.)

So I can't make any plans for a Friday night gimik or a Saturday gala day. Sad, pero ganun talaga. I'll have no one to make gala with on a Monday. The only option is Sunday. :( Anyway, the goal to get a life is slowly becoming a reality. That's one reason to be happy. There are actually more reasons to be happy now and when I look back, I wasn't this way a year ago (Most of the time I was frowning, snobbish and out of touch with reality. The only consolation I get is that my teammates' energy is overwhelming, it rubs on me most of the time.).

Just out of the blue, I remember having a conversation with one of my former professors who now works for Samsung Electronics. He was new to the company then and I was on my eighth month with Semphil. The conversation was becoming lengthy, and I had to get started for work. Before I left, he said one thing that I will always remember him by.

Walang perfect na trabaho. Lahat ng trabaho bullsh*t. It's all up to you on how you will make it easy for you...Find happiness in your work, not work in your happiness.

At dahil sa mga sinabing yan sa akin, nagbago talaga ang pananaw ko sa work. I can never thank him enough. Biruin nyo, kahit mayabang ang exterior ng prof kong yun, may mapupulot pa rin ako sa kanya di ba? Sa mga Mapuan diyan, super clue na yun. Oo, sa sobrang yabang nya, naisipan namin syang gawan ng Yabang Meter sa PCB Design Prototype. Wahaha...

On Saturdays, I'll be on my own. Literally. Walang mga bossing, officemates, at OJT. Wala lahat. Ako lang. Akin ang opisina. Akin ang mundo. Pero mabigat din ang responsibility. Hmm, I wonder if pwedeng di sumagot ng phone call pag Saturday? That's some evil plan dahil syempre di pwede anerst. Ano ko hilo? Binigay na nga ang mundo sa mga kamay ko, aabusuhin ko naman bonggang-bongga? Di pwede yun.

When plans don't push through

2010-09-25T09:19:00.008+08:00

I didn't go to the Orchestra Fest. I know, I know. I'm such a loser.

But Your Honor, because I have absolute rights to speak in my defense, please let me explain, in brief detail.

Exhibit A: Head ache, sore throat, runny nose, chills
The defendant has been nursing severe cough and colds since September 20, Monday. Her suffering was made more of a torture with the Winter Wonderland mockery that will later run for four days in the office (Ice sculpture na lang ang kulang. LOL). She has been in and out of the powder room, not to pat some powder on her face, but to clear her nose (so she can breathe) and her throat (so she can speak). She has been taking loads and loads of Therasil since September 20 to combat the bacterial forces that seek to make her voiceless for three days.

Exhibit B: O.R. only, no actual tickets
The defendant asked her sister to purchase the three tickets she reserved morning of September 22, in the nearest Robinson's mall before the O.R. expires 6PM that day. When the defendant got home and asked for them, the sister said they had a meeting she was required to attend and therefore missed the chance of purchasing the tickets.

Exhibit C: No "escort"
The defendant's sister, after approving plans of going with her, backed out in the final minute, saying she has something going on about her classes scheduled a day after the concert. The other escort/page turner, was reportedly so sick she couldn't get to work.

These exhibit laid before you, Your Honor, constitute the defendant's justifications for the cancellation.

And so, here I am, writing about my week. One shivering week. Hell. :(

They're playing my song!

2010-09-18T19:21:00.010+08:00

One fine day. This is for Lumina Pandit. Because deep within, I want to be a historian too. :(

Lumina Pandit is one exhibition I have longed to see. Problem is, when the exhibit opened in June, I don't have the time to go. Tapos, nung sumunod na months, I have no one to go with. Curse single-ness. It hurts real bad. Ugh. Anyway, I don't want to be as "productive" as I was last week so I decided to finally see Lumina in the UST Library. Pero di ko alam ang pasikot-sikot sa UST kaya naisip kong isama si Sir Charles, alumnus ng UST. When I texted him, binenta ko pa na mame-meet na nya ang twin sister ko para lang pumayag. Of course, I coordinated the schedule with my sister naman. She's ok with it and I pleaded she schedule her lunch with us. Jam-packed siya this Saturday, with work in the morning and Masteral classes in the afternoon till late evening. But sabi nya, okay lunch kami. Nanghinayang lang ako later on because of some glitches na kailangan asikasuhin for her class. School is a hindrance for good, old fun. Tsk, tsk.

(All photos courtesy of Charles Vincent Chan.)

My goodness, the face! While at lunch. Di ko rin alam kung anong sinasabi ko sa picture na ito.

Random shot.While texting/pleading for my sister to come.

If you google Lumina Pandit, pretty much you'll get what everything. It's an astonishing collection, something that may take quite a while to be organized again. My Spanish was put to test. At syempre, lagpak ako bonggang-bongga. LOL. Gusto ko talaga basahin yung Gloria Mundi. I heard it from my sister before, one of the eight volumes is on display. Pero men, I think I need a full understanding of some social studies ek-ek. And of course, some rare books are on exhibit too. Doctriana Cristiana was there (one of the two copies. The other is in the Vatican Library.) and Copernicus' De Revolutionibus Orbium Coelestium Libri (Wish I could browse this). For someone who loves to dig in History, this is a must-see. Sayang lang kasi di pala pwede ang mga walk-in guests to try the ancient printing press. Kuya Guard was so snobbish. There was no warning whatsoever that we can't try it so we assumed ok lang. Talagang we were trying to figure out how the thing works but before we can finish, he arrived to say it was an activity areas for guests with appointments. The hell, e di sana nilagyan nila ng DO NOT CROSS. Tse. Anyway, I don't want to ruin my day dahil kay Kuya Guard. Inenjoy ko na lang ang exhibit.

Pagkatapos sa UST Library, naging tour guide ko sa USTe si Sir. Nilubus-lubos ko na uy. Lahat ata ng sulok ng Royal, Pontifical and Catholic University e pinasok namin, maliban sa buildings of course. Pagod sya e. Rich kid kasi, alagang aircon ang balat ng Lolo mo, di sanay sa init ng araw. Di nag-eexercise kaya andaling napagod. Wahahaha...

In the name of the Father. Religious items on display.

***

While at lunch, Sir Chacha mentioned something about an orchestra concert in CCP. When I looked it up after I got home, gusto ko na mahimatay. Goodness, almost all of the country's great orchestra will be there! Right there and then, sabi ko pupuntahan ko talaga ito. The concert is the 1st National Orchestra Festival, showcasing the Philippine Philharmonic, Filharmonika, UST Symphony and the UP Orchestra. The music fest will run from September 21-25.

So the thing is, I was planning to go at the last day of the festival (dahil dun lang ako pwede) but when I saw the program a day before it ends, the orchestra from Angono will be playing Concerto in A minor. And I suddenly turned all giddy and excited. KAMON! It's my well loved Vivaldi piece! I first heard it in a recital nine years back as a concerto for two violins, played by the ever so talented PREDIS instrumentalists Regine Imperial and Junior Saraza. Yes, I remembered their names because their performance took my breath away. And yes, Saraza is the gifted kid from the Promil commercial years back. Google his name if you don't believe me. But never mind the past, I will hear it live, with a full orchestra on the 25th! Never mind that a lesser known orchestra will be playing it, the program highlights more pieces than in the closing or in any other date. I will move heaven and earth to be there. Bahala na ang monitoring ng Patrol. I will make ends meet no matter what!

***

At the end of the day, my legs are begging for rest. But who cares? Masaya naman ang araw na to. :) Now, what are the plans next Saturday? Hmmm...

Oh impatience, how inappropriate

2010-09-14T22:23:00.006+08:00

At one point of my life, I was at a crossroad. I chose a path, walked, and found another crossroad. The reasons of the first path I have chosen are easy to find. The latest one, however, is one tough nut to crack.

***

The question on what to do on my free time was answered tonight, during a conversation with Mudravess about me taking up Master's next year.

***

So first off, the question I ask myself is, Why take up graduate studies? A Master's degree will take me places. And I mean abroad, my dear. Far beyond the Philippine-bounded PRC license everyone's so passionate to get (This is one reason I dislike the licensure exam). Plans of going abroad are big no-no as of the moment as I have yet to conquer this country. So why get it when I don't have any plans of going abroad? My answer is: That's why I said as of the moment (Please pay attention). I don't discount the possibility that it would be plausible to pursue a career abroad, provided my employer allows me to surf Facebook and blog my rants all day. Harharharhar...Joke lang syempre.

***

Second question: When should I enroll? My mother is pushing that I study come this January. She said she's willing to shoulder half the budget. And I'm like, wtf? What's the rush? I really don't get it. The desire to study is inherent in me naman, and it doesn't fade away that easy. Kahit bukas pa ko mag-enroll, nako. Alam na alam ko ang sulok ng Mapua. I mean, come on. Mamamatay na ba ako sa 2012 kaya sa 2011 kelangan naka-enroll na ko? Di ko makita ang logic. :(

***

Perhaps, when the time comes that I have fully mastered the ins and outs of the broadcast industry (Mahirap kayang mag-aral at isasabay pa sa pioneering department kong mahal), and when I have the money to pay for it (something that is three terms worth or millions in my and Sir Chacha's currency. Homay, yoko pag-usapan ang pera. Naka-cacardiac arrest na naman ako. T_T), and when I find the best school that offers the curriculum that encompasses the line of my work, only then can I enroll. Take note, naka-AND ang statements na yan. So dapat TRUE lahat para maka-output ako.

***

My conversation with my endearing mother ended abruptly when I, impatient and unyielding at the time, said, "Mag-eenroll din ako. Ine-estimate ko lang ang sched ko sa October at sa January."

***

I'm always mistaken for a high school student most of the time that I wonder if my mother thinks the same. *Sigh*

(Home)sick

2010-09-11T12:36:00.006+08:00

So there is a thing as a long weekend! Wow, bago ito. Before, masaya na ko if free ang weekend. Ngayon, aba, pwede palang free din ang Friday ko. But the funny thing is I don't have much to do. Yesterday, nagdownload lang ako ng Torrent. Then, internet. Tapos internet. O di ba, napaka-productive ko!

***

Minsan, napag-iisip-isip ko din, ang pangit din ng walang ginagawa. Minsan, namimiss ko din ang busy schedule ko. I'm thinking of something to do on weekends. Will it be academic or non-academic? Career ba or non-career related? The choice is still, well, blurry.

***

P*ta. I so miss you guys. :(

They govern in prose

2010-09-08T22:09:00.003+08:00

I was a writer for my previous company's newsletter. Yes, beyond the schedule I have to balance I have extra tasks on the side. Di ko alam e. Ganun talaga. Extra curricular activities make work more bearable for me perhaps. So I really enjoyed writing as much as I can about any topic the Editor-in-Chief will ask of me.

Close to my second issue, the company underwent a major change: The current president will be going back to Korea and he will be replaced with someone so new to the Philippine plant. It was a period of transition, of new leadership. The new President speaks very few Filipino and knows very few of his workforce. But days after his appointment, I could really feel the direction he wanted us to take. Meeting with the engineers and supervisors was held more often. Education facilitated by the Korean expats for the engineers and above was scheduled left and right. From that point on, it didn't matter if he speaks very few Filipino (there are people who can translate his quotable quotes in English), or he knows very few of his workforce (thus, the Tanghalian with the President). What truly mattered was he had a plan for the company. And he wasn't wasting any time to get to where he wanted us to go.

Talk about smooth transition. Now, I can't help but make a parallel situation with The Republic. I mean, come on. It's been 69 days since the current Administration started and still, I can't see to where this country is heading! As days pass, I can't help but think that the promise of "hope, change and a chance to dream again" is as vague as Mona Lisa's smile. Indeed, politicians campaign by poetry; they govern by prose. And sometimes, the prose becomes too intertwined with everything, it transforms to an essay! What shall become of this nation then?

Any statesman, and I mean any statesman, can at least get his house in order. By his house, I mean his staff, his under wings, his go-to guys, those he can rely on when things go so out of hand. He achieves that by making HIS choice of who shall serve him. Not who others chose for him. When he gets his house fully oiled and ready to go, the rest of his objectives will be easier to achieve. If the reverse happens, then I heave a sigh, a loud sigh to my aunts and cousins in Marikina who voted for him and in the silence of the night, I mutter in disguise, "Sana si Manny Villar na lang." Of course, I'll say that very, very softly. In 20 phons loudness. Or else, I'll be crucified alive because I forgot I was in their house and not mine, when I committed the crime. Lo and behold, if and only if I'm staying with my Tito and Tita in Batangas, I will not mutter in the dark. I will say it proud and about, "Sana si Manny Villar na lang!" Ah, I can hear the applause of approval. But that's IF and only IF. In most times, the first case is reenacted, albeit, with different people and in different houses.

So how long should I say "Sana si Manny Villar na lang?"

Slept late, woke up late but still made it early today

2010-09-06T21:35:00.006+08:00

Juice mio...

So we were tasked to monitor the primetime news for a week as part of our training. The task is to look for discrepancies in audio and video for the entire duration of the program. What makes the task doubly hard is that we have to note the time of every segment, the reporter, kung playback ba or live, and the location (if live).

Hay nako, eto na lang. Di kami magkaintindihan sa pagmonitor. Walang hiya, sunod-sunod ang mga segment. The first gap (the show itself before any commercial break) lasted for exactly 30 minutes, and lotsa, lotsa segments and with overflowing discrepancies! Whoa. Iba talaga pag live ang minomonitor. Sa sobrang sunod-sunod, namix up ko na nga ang names ng discrepancy. I didn't understand a single segment since I was too busy looking for errors. Wahahaha. I need a more critical eye for these things since I'll be needing it to get the job done.

***

Kahit anong gawin ko, maaga talaga akong nakakauwi these days. Ang travel time ko ngayon was like from home to Mapua and back. And my sleeping pattern is something like this: I sleep late, I wake up late, but still make it early to the office. Now, how cool is that? Parang nag-ayos lang ako ng sched sa Mymapua. :D

But sometimes, I still find it a bit odd. My body clock still hasn't caught up with the new schedule (Or maybe, my body is making up for that one year I was sleeping for less than five hours a day The side effect of which includes a pimple-infested face never before seen in the course of my skin's history). At times, I find myself waking around four in the morning and I find it hard sleeping before 11.30pm. At nasanay ako sa sobrang punctual ko sa Lawton shuttle, kahit pag-alis ko ng bahay, maaga pa din (If it's a choice between punctuality and tardiness, I'd rather choose the former.).

I find a lot of things odd. The working schedule is one (Primetime is the rush hour. Daytime is petiks time); the travel time next (Home in less than an hour after work); people dressed to the nines. The place is so different I'm still having culture shock (and star stuck too) sometimes.

It's hard to break away from the old ways, but hopefully, I can make a smooth transition.

The things I miss in my erstwhile office...

2010-09-05T15:18:00.004+08:00

My own computer
My own chair (The one that I can drag wherever I want)
Spacious office (Our current office is literally cute)
The room temperature (I'll say it time and again, sobrang lamig sa office ko ngayon. Amp, napapamura ako sa lamig. OA naman talaga ang aircon, parang galit na galit sa amin. Kung para sa equipment yun, haler, wala kayang equipment sa office namin.)
Mysingle messenger
Ang madlang people (Ang konti lang namin sa department. The head, supervisor, then the three analysts. Then we have OJT's na hindi ko rin masyadong nakikita dahil nasa immersion lagi.)
The structure
Affordable junk food sa break area
My locker
The morning meeting :) (KKN was so brief it died a natural death)

In the spirit of journalism (and to keep things balanced), here's the list of...

Things I don't miss in my erstwhile office:

The travel time
The overtime
The Don't-bring-USB-or-any-electronic-gadget rule
The dress code
The 140dB sound level in some work areas.
The Saturday working days
Those rainy and floody nights I get stuck in Lawton waiting for a ride home (Ok, medyo off topic, pero di ko talaga mamimiss 'to teh)

When in a quiet village...

2010-09-01T22:08:00.003+08:00

Overall, this week feels like a new start. Like I'm a college freshman once again. At least to me.

My new work is kinda...I don't know. As of the moment, work starts at 9AM and ends at 6PM. So my waking and sleeping hours are out of control. Can't wake up at the right time. Can't sleep at the right time either. To get to work requires under an hour and to get back, I just need another hour. And oh, I get a lot of exercise walking along Blumentritt to the Espana terminal and from Sgt. Esguerra to Mother Ignacia, which serves my under toned leg muscles well. I can wear make up (and in fact, still do some retouch) because I'll never sweat inside the freezing temperature of the company's main building. There's no dress code. Everyone's free to wear anything.

Everything is just so...ideal. That makes me even more cautious.

Soldiers assigned at the South say that when you pass by a very quiet village, it is an omen for an impending danger.

And everything is just so still in QC! :(

There I go

2010-08-29T00:10:00.008+08:00

Ayan po, last day ko kahapon sa Samsung Electro-Mechanics. Nakakalungkot na di ko mawari. Mixed emotions e. Pero syempre, mamimiss ko rin ang SEMPhil. First job ko yun e. Tapos memorable pa ang mga naging kasama ko. It's like we were in a big class and everyone is a high school stereotype. There's the jock, the class president, the principal, the director, the bullies (kelangan plural talaga), the transferees, the nerd, and the rich kid. After Kuya Ace, wala na sigurong mas makaka-"bully" (I can't find the right term) sa akin kagaya ng Equipment Team.

***

What made the day even more memorable was that they threw a surprise send off party for me. I really wonder how they pulled it off. Nung una medyo suspicious na ko e. Parang ang daming nangyayari at wala sila sa table nila, pag Saturday naman di ganun ka busy as weekdays. Muntik pa kong di pumunta kasi talagang inaantok na ko mga 10.45am pa lang, kasi, well, despedida ko naman with my batchmates the night before (As usual, umaga na ko nakauwi). Talagang antok na ko, sinabihan ko na si Sir Charles na di na ko maglulunch at matutulog na lang ako. Syempre Equipment si Sir, sinabihan ako ng boring. Na mag-aaya-aya ako ng lunch tas di ko tutuloy at iba pang chuvaness ekek na pangongonsensya. E ako naman, madaling mauto, at naawa naman ako wala siyang kasabay, kaya sige, kinalimutan ko na muna ang antok at tumuloy kami ng lunch. May props pa syang attendance ng NEO para may dahilan pumunta ng Pro-Sem Room. At nung tinanong ko kung para san ang videocam na dala nya, ang panalong sagot ay: Sa productivity. Sa Pellet Pressing. Wahahaha. I was teasing him after the party: Productivity pala ha. To which he replied: Andami kong sinungaling dahil sa 'yo e. Tanong ka nang tanong. Sir Cha, anong gagawin? Ahahaha...

***

So they made an AVP, with interviews, pictures and all. Sakit lang sa mata nung una, puro mukha ko lang nakikita. I was in tears umpisa pa lang (Opo, mababa talaga luha ko.). E kasi naman friends, never pa may gumawa sa kin nun anerst. 'Twas the first time. Touched ako bonggang-bongga. At bongga din kasi wala pala akong hanky nun. Kamay lang ang pamunas ng luha ko. Tapos nung malaman ko na hindi talaga celebration ng regularization nina Kaiser, Robert at Rudy ang dahilan ng pa-pizza, at kinikil pa ni Sir Jim ang funds na pang-pizza, aba naman, mas lalo akong na-touch. The guys went out of their way to give me that party (I'm close to tears again, ahaha). I was right. These guys are really sweet. Kahit di halata. ^_~

***

Isang comment lang. Wala si Sir Gerry sa video. :( . Di ata napilit, walang pambayad sa talent fee. Ahaha. Sir Gerry, kahit alam kong di mo mababasa ito, korni mo di ka nagpa-interview! Malay mo ba if makuha ung file at pasa ko sa Entertainment ang clip nung interview mo, e di may kinabukasan na ang naudlot mong showbiz career. Hehehe. Kayo na po ang bahala sa news natin. News correspondent, signing off!

***

I won't forget. That's certain.

***

Hay, nakalimutan kong kopyahin ang single address nilang lahat. Damn. I really, really need a reminder software in my head now. Kulang ang nagpapanggap na post-it sa cellphone.

The Big Blunder

2010-08-22T22:40:00.005+08:00

Way back, we did a lampoon issue of The New Builder. The whole issue was a joke, from the articles, to the graphics, the headers and the editorial. It was fun making the lampoon, although the conceptualizing of the content was the hardest part.

So there was I, washing the dishes kanina. Then it dawned on me. Why not make a blunder as a farewell gift to myself? This is just out of my kakulitan.

Disclaimer: No harm intended to the song or the composer. Please sing to the tune of Candle in the Wind.

Here it goes:

Goodbye Equipment's rose
May you ever grow in our hearts
You were the grace that placed Jerome
And then you tore his heart.
Then he called out your name
But you whispered to his grimace
Now you belong to the city
And the TV spells out your name

And it seems to me you lived your life
Like the only girl in the team
Never blending with the masculines
When hormones set in
And your table will always be here
Against the wall and farthest back
Your letter's signed out long before
You passed it to Mr.Seo

Girly-ness we've lost
These boring days without the peace sign
This torch we'll always carry
For Equipment's very rich child
And even though he'll try
The truth brings him to tears
All our words cannot express
The joy you brought him this one year

And it seems to me you lived your life
Like the only girl in the team
Never blending with the masculines
When hormones set in
And your table will always be here
Against the wall and farthest back
Your letter's signed out long before
You passed it to Mr.Seo

Goodbye Equipment's rose
May you ever grow in our hearts
You were the grace that placed Jerome
And then you tore his heart.
Goodbye Equipment's rose
From PM team lost the only girl
Who'll miss your soundless laughter
More than you'll ever know

And it seems to me you lived your life
Like the only girl in the team
Never blending with the masculines
When hormones set in
And your table will always be here
Against the wall and farthest back
Your letter's signed out long before
You passed it to Mr.Seo

And your table will always be here
Against the wall and farthest back
Your letter's signed out long before
You passed it to Mr.Seo

Never too late to chase after my dreams

2010-08-15T14:18:00.005+08:00

It started with a call--something that took a while to sink in. Until finally, reality hit me again as if to say: This is for real.

To cut the long story short, I passed my resignation letter last Friday (which will be effective Aug. 30). I'll be exploring a different horizon. This time, in the Broadcast industry.

Although I've been with Samsung for a year (and 12 days) now, to be part of something very much in line with my specialization is like a dream come true. It's like euphoria, nirvana, and heaven rolled into one. The opportunity came when I least expect it and I have to thank Emman and Norman who have been very supportive of my choice. Apparently, they were the ones who made the HR dig into my records. Guys, Allah will bless you. While you're at it conquering the Middle East, I shall stay to do the same here. I can never repay the generosity you bestowed me that day. May good karma bless your way in Qatar and Saudi Arabia.

It will be difficult to leave but I have to move on. It's been a fun and exciting year in Samsung, which is made memorable by the Machine Development Team. Never will I forget the pizza sessions, the lunch or dinner at JP's and Suwon (and oh, I'll miss Korean food as well), and the gags and antics making life more bearable for me.

Anyway, it's not goodbye. At least not YET. There's still pending work to be done. Until then, I'll be a Samsung-nite. LOL.

Too many times

2010-08-06T20:46:00.004+08:00

There are many times that I've thought of quitting. Many times, that I lost count. I often make a bet with myself that I'll be going on this day or the next. But days became weeks, and weeks became months. And suddenly, I realize it's been a year that I've been doing this.

There are many times that I lost my self-esteem. Sometimes, when I feel I'm suddenly getting it back, something will push me back to my shell to retreat. One ruthless surrender. I'm dead tired of the way things are. I'm bored with the life I have now.

I'm stressed. I'm not eating right. The last taste of fruit that I had was the (uber mahal na) yogurt (na binili ni Ate) with apple syrup, mango and granola (but I didn't finish it. I ate one-eighth of it and let Ate had the rest). Before that, I ate green mangoes for dinner two months back I suppose. When a colleague saw me the following day, all he said was, "Ate Mel, ang bilog na ng pisngi mo." After that day, I skipped meal breaks, ate little lunch, and sometimes skipped dinner too. And just tonight after dinner, I felt guilty because I felt full.

All that to maintain my "ideal" body weight.

This is just so bad. I'm ever self-conscious of my weight. Damn it. I don't even know what my ideal weight should be. Lahat ng nakakakita sa ken sabi ang payat ko na. Aware naman ako, kaya lang talaga, nahihirapan naman akong kumain. It may sound weird but it is the truth. Although I'm trying, I'm also afraid to gain it. Baka naman kasi masabihan na naman ako na bumibilog ang cheeks ko.

To keep my ears closed to what others may say is easier said than done. My world revolves too much around the standards of our judgemental society. Mold yourself into something fake and superficial, and not surprisingly you fit in. I've been stuck in this blackhole for a while now. Maybe, it's time to get out.

Uneventful

2010-07-31T21:04:00.002+08:00

Nakakadepress ang ulan. Nakakalungkot. Although alam kong masaya ang mga puno at halaman, ako naman ay talagang nalulungkot. Para kasing ang aloof ng mga tao pag umuulan. Everyone minds their own business. Lahat busy paghanap ng masisinlungan, o kaya naman ng masasakyan pauwi. Yung iba, abala sa pagtawid sa obstacle course na dulot ng baha. Lahat nakasimangot.

E pano ba namang hindi? Kung ikaw commuter ka (tulad ko), tapos biglang babagsak ang ulan tipong pagbaba mo sa jeep (o kaya nag-aabang ng masasakyan pauwi), at maaalala mong wala kang dalang payong, sinong nasa matinong pag-iisip ang magtatalon sa tuwa dahil umulan? Tapos nandyan pa ang banta ng baha, at overcharging ng mga pedicab dahil sila lang ang matatag na makikipag-sabayan sa rumaragasang tubig baha, at higit sa lahat (ito ang matinding kinaiinisan ko), nababasa nang bongga ang shoes, socks at feet ko.

Hay. Gabi-gabi na lang umuulan. At bumubuhos lagi ang tubig galing kalangitan. Parang kelan lang, panahon ng tag-init. Parang kelan lang, humihiling ako sa langit. Na sana walang ulan....para di bumigat ang bag ko dahil sa payong. Hehehe.

***

How do you give back to someone who helped you so much in the past? I'm thinking of some ways...pero wala pa din ako maisip. Wala akong creative juices ngayon. Sad.

Dare to be at the front

2010-07-24T21:12:00.003+08:00

Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero parang ang haba ng week na ito. Siguro kasi I started on the wrong foot, kaya feeling ko ang bagal-bagal ng oras.

Recap: Last week pa nagsimula ang mahiwagang asthma ko (which randomly kicks in, especially if there are drastic weather changes). Ang masakit pa e pinilit ko pumasok ng Monday. Ang ending ko na lang ay ubo na sa sobrang malala na, tunog pa lang parang iraratay na ko. Sabi nga nina Ate Zhel, magpa-check up na ko. Dapat talaga papacheck-up ako kaya ako umabsent.Pero ewan ko ba, ayoko na ata talagang makakita ng doktor sa buhay ko...Feeling ko pag nagkita kami ng doktor, i-coconfine na ko. Excluding the medical sa Samsung, the last check up I had was when I was in Grade 6, if I recall right. Kahit may times na may asthma attacks ako, I don't go to a doctor. Self-medication lang. I had the disease for as long as I can remember that I already know what to do when I'm having an attack.

Tapos wala naman akong ginawa sa bahay. Nabato lang ako nang bongga. Nangungulit na lang ako ng mga friends via text. Buti na lang kahit pano naka-Immortal ako nung araw na yun, kahit pano may panlaban ako sa boredom.

Nung araw na absent ako sa Samsung napagtanto ko din na ang boring talaga ng buhay ko. Walang bagong happenings. So naisip ko na gumawa ng something na alam kong lalaitin, lolokohin at pagtitinginan ako ng lahat sa office--ang magsuot ng skirt above the knee. Klaro ko lang, above the knee ang skirt ko ha. Bago i-execute ang aking grandiose plan, tinanong ko muna si Sir Chacha kung anong bawal na skirt na skirt length sa company, kasi syempre, baka di ako papasukin. Ang sabi ni Sir Chacha, na tinanong pa niya kay Sir Isael: Pwedeng above the knee, wag lang mini.

Mangyari e, I have this red plaid skirt that I got from Tutuban night market a year back. I bought it for one reason: to create a look similar to a Japanese school girl, with the knee high socks and all. It took me years to search for the perfect plaid skirt. Although the look is still incomplete (I'm having problems with a white polo that fits me best), I can still wear the skirt with virtually any girly top and still look fabulous. Of course, mas madaling maghanap ng knee high socks and the Chuck Taylor shoes to go with it. Planado na lahat yan nung college pa pero ngayon ko lang nasakatuparan nang bonggang-bongga.

Getting in the company is another story. While nakalusot ako sa kapaan blues, hinahanapan ako ng pants nung nasa bag searching na. Ang sabi ko syempre wala. Sir Jim was just behind me and he knew all along I was wearing a skirt (dahil katabi ko sya sa shuttle) and was gradually having problems with the security guards. I was touched later when he called to ask where I was (I was at the locker) and he told me he texted my manager. Just in case di ako papasukin, maghintay daw ako sa guard house, someone will come to my rescue. Really, kahit lagi nila akong inaasar, these guys can be sweet sometimes. :)

Mas bongga pa kay bonggang-bonggang Bongbong ang ginawa kong pag-insist na tinanong ko muna sa HR ang policies regarding skirt length bago ko sinuot ang skirt ko. Pwede naman e kasi di naman mini skirt ang suot ko. Nakikipag-away pa ko kasi may pinakita silang picture na skirt na micro mini, and the guard was inisisting na di pwede yung suot ko. I have to defend myself na di naman katulad ng nasa picture ang suot ko. Mine was just above the knee for goodness' sake...paulit-ulit! In the end, when I told them I was from Manila pa, di na nila ako pinabalik to get another skirt or a pair of pants. When I realized everything was ok na, umakyat na ko ng office. Ayun, katakut-takot na mga feedback ang natanggap ko, ranging from good and ok to funny and flattering. It turns out I was the only one crazy enough to dare the company dress code and get away with it for the day (One pregnant employee kept wearing dresses more provoking than what I was wearing that day, and nobody was reprimanding her. I figured that maybe the rules on dress code are not implemented equally on everybody. Pero dahil laking Manila ako at under ako ni Mayor Fred Lim, I just want slap them with my Mayor's one golden rule--The law applies to all, otherwise to none at all.). But I don't care. I don't think it will make any significance if I pay attention to the glares and whispers behind my back. Nasuot ko na ang gusto ko e. Bakit ba? E di dare rin nila ang company dress code. Wahahaha....

******

On sad note, my Charmaine's sister died just this morning. Roxanne, or Jija to family and close friends, inherited my post as Literary Editor in the high school paper after I graduated, and later becoming the EIC. She was a nice kid with good writing genes. Melanie and I will be going to her wake tomorrow since malapit lang ang bahay nila. Sunday will be one busy day.